There is a new king on the throne of the worst catchy tunes: Baby Shark most certainly born. The catchy tune has been played 7.04 billion times in the past few years. A new world record that causes our author to have a nervous breakdown.
After the gruesome million-dollar hit "Schnappi the little crocodile" you feel safe for 16 years and then suddenly this one appears: "Baby Shark" is just taking over the boombox in children's rooms. And that is exactly what Luis Fonsis now comes across Despacito as the most watched Youtube video in the world from the throne. The clip has been played 7.04 billion times to date.
Just why?
Why in Heavenly Names do you voluntarily infect your children with this terrible song? Wasn't Schnappi bad enough in 2014? Didn't anyone learn anything from this?
And now this: Bäääby Shark dododododododo Bääääbby Shaaaark.
It's good that toddlers think that's great, I can still understand that. But adults? What's wrong with you?
Are all spiritually deranged now?
The song about the cartoon shark family has zero content, is only thirty seconds long, but you get something of it all day. Yet there are people – it is hard to believe – who, in full possession of their intellectual abilities, VOLUNTARILY click the video. After all, the children's song is one of the thirty most-clicked clips on YouTube. The South Korean ear disease has already been heard a total of 2.2 billion times. Four times as much as people live in the small country.
Conspiracy theory: Baby Shark wants to usurp world domination
I have a theory:
We should think that: Oh how cute, a cute kid is dancing the Baby Shark Dance to Baby Shark Mucke.
That's the truth: All hypnosis that is supposed to turn us into incapable, docile Baby Shark Borg. South Korea plans to take power in the children's rooms. And it's the internet's fault. Because suddenly South Korea is very close. The catchy electronic beat of the song does the rest. If the song is played a lot in kindergartens, children want to sing it at home with their parents and bang: everyone is infected.
You are now probably thinking: I no longer have them all? I can only say: Look what the song has already done!
Everything comes back at some point …
You can see that. Unfortunately, that doesn't only apply to fashion sins like low rise jeans and cycling shorts, but also to terrible children's songs. At some point, however, the phase is over again. For sure a new horror will be taken out of the box in the attic. Maybe it's the shoulder pads, but maybe also new hits in the style of Baby Shark. With luck, however, we will have 14 years to recover.