The Bachelorette divides the fan community. Some find the current season terrible, others celebrate it very much. Our author belongs to the latter and explains why.
I’m not the classic trash TV consumer. Basically, my wealth of experience is limited to the last seasons of Bachelor and a new season of Bachelorette, which I unfortunately found so lame that I immediately deselected the format. But I know a lot of people who can relax wonderfully while doing it. And that’s how I came to the current Bachelorette. The new season was recommended to me by a friend who said: “It’s so good how enlightened and open-minded women explain the world to men.”
Huh? Women? Have we made a mistake in the format and are still on Princess Charming? No, we don’t, I just seem to live behind the moon and didn’t notice. For everyone who feels the same way. Stella, the bachelorette, is bisexual and is dating both women and men this season, all of whom are moving into the candidates’ villa. Lots of potential for escapades, flirtations and fumbling. Or so I thought. But things turned out much better.
Background: The first to date women and men
Bachelorette Stella is no stranger to reality fans. In 2023, the 26-year-old from Munich was a participant in the first season of Too Hot to Handle: Germany. She didn’t find the man for life there, but she fell in love with a candidate with whom she had an open relationship. This relationship only lasted a few months – now, a year later, Stella is daring to search again and is dating men and women in Thailand. And as is always the case, some find her inauthentic and assume that she is only looking for fame, others, like me, have found her very likeable and friendly so far. I especially like her calm way of dealing with the boys and girls.
What the hell – They didn’t apply for this!
While the women knew what to expect, the men first had to digest the shock when the five self-confident ladies stormed the candidates’ villa. Maybe not fair, but entertaining. This, but also the bachelorette’s openness when it comes to relationships and sexuality, causes a lot of confusion among men: What, the bachelorette is looking for an open relationship? Or a monogamous one? How are you supposed to compete with women? Do I even want this anymore? And above all: where did I end up here?
One or the other (Martin) can clearly see that he would not have applied for this. You’re looking for a woman for life and suddenly everything is turned upside down in this format. Others, however (Erik, Ferry) celebrate the new thing and get involved in it straight away. Then there’s a lot in between – for example Markus, for whom an open relationship means getting a second wife while on vacation. A man? No, that would be something different. Some people don’t really know what’s actually happening to them at first.
And so, in the middle of trash TV, there is suddenly a lot of space to open up to new things, to develop further, to learn new words (e.g. heteronormative), to question your own mindset or not, but of course also to define your own boundaries .
Come to clarify
The women had fewer questions, but more to say. Candidate Aysun in particular makes it very clear what she has set out to do here: “It’s very important to me to show men where to go when it comes to the topic of feminism.” And some people definitely still have a lot of catching up to do: women and men on a date? So that would just be an argument, that’s not possible. After all, women and men work completely differently… It’s going to be explosive – I’m excited! And in fact, we don’t have to wait long. Right at the beginning there is a small workshop on the topic: “Why you shouldn’t say ‘mentally ill’.” While some men don’t want to understand what the point is at all (“I didn’t apply for a political correctness squad”), others take the opportunity to at least look into it. Evil tongues claim that this was all a calculation by RTL to show off the men. Possible, but it’s a provocative show.
© RTL
And it’s just that: alongside the wokeness of the girls, Bennett unfortunately comes across as a Neanderthal who complains about the fact that you’re not allowed to say anything these days. A point that is also causing a lot of conversation on social media. This can be criticized as unfair and intentional, but the villa also shows the range between opinion and small-mindedness. And for everyone who is now afraid that it will continue like this all the time: No, don’t worry, it will be cute too. And with someone who doesn’t fit the stereotypical masculinity cliché in reality formats. The reactions to it, however, were very positive.
pent-up demand
Of course, the Bachelorette is a TV format and not a social study. Nevertheless, here too, as in other areas of life, it can be seen how men and women are drifting apart. This can be seen particularly well in the comment columns on social media or in the election results. This drifting apart is particularly clear in the so-called mating gap, which describes how it is becoming increasingly difficult for women to find a partner on equal terms. This primarily relates to the educational level of both sexes, which means for more and more women either not being able to find a suitable partner or having to make significant compromises. To ensure that we don’t drift further apart in the coming decades, we need more dialogue, open ears and the willingness to question ourselves from time to time so that rapprochement is possible again. And maybe watching Bachelorette will even help with that.