Beast Breakup
How we manage to end a lost friendship
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It is very hard to get used to the loss of a person who has been close to us for a long time, supported us and was our contact person in all situations. We give you tips on how best to deal with a lost friendship.
At some point your girlfriend contacted you less frequently until it stopped completely? Your best friend moved away and you lost contact? Some close relationships don’t last forever, as it is often said about friendships. This can happen to us at any age and often catches us unprepared.
It may be because we have changed ourselves or the other person has changed a lot. Maybe life circumstances have changed in general. But what is true in all of these cases is that saying goodbye to a past friendship is difficult. We often ask ourselves what we could have done differently, if it really is too late and if we will find such a person again. The following points should help when a lost friendship does not let us go.
1. Stop looking at old photos
When a friendship has ended, we often cling to past memories and keep looking back to the “good old days”. The problem with that is that it only makes us miss the person more. It can definitely help you to look at photos or even small gifts again. Ultimately, it’s best to pack them in a box and store them in a drawer.
When you are sure that the friendship has ended, you should collect everything and put it away. You can still take the time to reminisce occasionally, but seeing that person every day won’t help you deal with the loss. This also applies to social media profiles that you could check out.
2. Find new interests and create new memories
Even if we rarely notice friendships can hold us back. Maybe you just sat with your best friend and talked and had a few glasses of wine – or watched the worst romantic comedy with her because you could laugh about it so well. At the same time, she didn’t feel like trying new things and going out.
How has friendship prevented you from doing things you wanted to do? Try them now! With another friend or alone. Find out what you enjoy And can get you out of the sad thoughts. In general that means more time with yourself to spend and to do you some goodwhich you may have only done as a duo before.
3. Talk to people you trust
It can help about the feelingswhich arose through the separation from the friend, too talk. It’s best if you trust yourself a person close to you at, who is not friends with said person herself. Because that can only lead to an unnecessary conflict. Exchange ideas about each other’s experiences. Because most people have already lost friends in their lives, through moving, for personal or sometimes unknown reasons.
If you find it difficult to bring up the subject in front of your loved ones, you can possibly therapy help get over it. Other options are Meditation exercises, further articles on the topic, self-reflection or writing down your feelings in a journal. Find the right way for you to process your thoughts and move forward.
Does a friendship really have to end?
Most ending relationships have one fundamental problem: lack of communication. This can be doomed to our friendships, especially when one person is willing to take it all in and eventually decides that they’ve had enough. She no longer reports or cancels more and more often, no longer asks what’s going on in other people’s lives.
This leads to, that the other person often has no idea what they might have done wrong – and keeps asking the same questions. If you want to tie up on a friendship and can engage in dialogue with the person, it’s a way for you to learn about the relationship and about yourself. What bothered the other? Is the friendship really over or can you work on the issues and improve your relationship? We often find it uncomfortable to dig deeper into such things and seek clarification. But it can be a good step towards more self-reflection and empathy towards others. Especially when we might be dealing with insecurities and feelings of guilt because we don’t know exactly what happened and whether we were responsible for it.
Sources used: psychcentral.com, evolvetreatment.com, scienceofpeople.com