Digital jealousy: 5 tips on how to deal with it

No, digital jealousy is not about who has the newest and greatest smartphone. Behind it is much more of a possible relationship killer …

Definition of digital jealousy

Most of us know jealousy and in the internet age it doesn't stop at our digital life either! Behind the concept of digital jealousy hides a feeling of jealousy that arises through social networks: Why does my partner like a picture of another (scantily clad) woman? Who is the new friend added? Why does my partner prefer to spend time on social media than with me?

All of this can encourage jealousy and lead to further actions, such as browsing the partner's Facebook page regularly, checking the likes given by the partner to others, spying on a friend's work colleague on Instagram, etc. You don't have to think twice about it White: It's poison for the relationship.

Digital jealousy: who is affected

Most people know jealousy from personal experience. Some people are more likely to be jealous than others. Some experts assume that low self-esteem is associated with a higher tendency to be jealous. And how intensely the jealousy is experienced also depends on your own self-esteem. Because jealousy occurs when we feel insecure.

A study on digital jealousy with 214 participants in Germany, which was published in the Journal of Business and Media Psychology, suggests that people who have a have a high tendency to jealousy, also perceive information from the net as rather threatening – "especially when there is little trust in the partner," as it is called there. Social media can not only be triggers, but also intensifiers of jealousy.

If you find it difficult to deal with your boyfriend's or girlfriend's activities online, here are a few tips!

Digital jealousy – what can I do?

We'll give you five tips on how to combat digital jealousy:

1. Gain distance

Instead of following your impulse and blaming your partner, you should take time out. The online media make information available to us around the clock, we are quickly tempted to just take a look at what the partner is up to, etc. Our feelings can quickly run away with us – and that's it we say something that we regret but cannot take back. Before the fantasy gets away with you, get some distance from this situation, sleep over it for a night – and then decide how you will deal with it.

2. Digital separation

Don't just take a moment off, a digital breakup can also help. Unfriend and unfollow yourself on social media and take the pressure off that comes with it. It is important that you trust yourself – otherwise it will not work. Tip: Learning to trust is not easy, but it is feasible.

3. Questioning

Facebook, Instagram & Co. show us the beautiful sides – at least superficially, because everyone presents themselves in the best possible way on social networks. And actually we also know that there cheated a lot will – so don't let the perfectly staged images provoke you, because that's exactly what they are: namely staged. They do not always represent the (whole) reality and nobody's life is perfect.

4. Talk to your partner

One of the problems is that content or the Social media activities are interpreted differently can. Do you keep noticing that your partner likes posts from others or is constantly following new women or men or making friends with them? You could now imagine the wildest fantasies – or you can talk to your partner. Ask him or her what this is all about. Does your friend really find others more attractive or is it just the cousin after all? Try to make it clear how the behavior of your loved one affects you and talk openly about how you feel.

5. Practice self-love

Okay, this is really not an SOS tip that can be implemented. If you find yourself feeling jealous more often and it is a long-term burden on your relationship, ask yourself what are you jealous of. Are you really jealous of your partner's girlfriend or does she embody something that you would like to be yourself ?! Here we show you how you can overcome this and learn to love yourself.

Tip: If you want to talk to others about the subject of jealousy, you can find like-minded people in the Brigitte Community.