Just do it!
Don’t despair… Why hard decisions are great
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Unfortunately, it’s like this: difficult decisions are not always important, but important decisions (children! partner! work!) are often difficult. The biggest mistake is actually just not making the decision at all.
by Eva Manegold
It starts at breakfast with the choice of muesli and ends in the evening with the consideration of whether we should really get up again to brush our teeth: we make decisions throughout the day. Admittedly, very few of them are really difficult. Most of the time we decide quickly and intuitively or are not even aware that we are making a choice.
The bigger the choice, the freer we are – right?
To be honest: I often don’t feel particularly free when I have to weigh up between 20 types of muesli when shopping and between sports, friends and family in the evening. Almost anything is possible, but this also increases the pressure to make the right decision. This may still be bearable in front of the supermarket shelf, since the consequences of this decision are generally not life-changing.
However, it is completely different when it comes to the essential questions in life: Do I want children – yes or no? Do I prefer to start a secure job or one that really interests me? Should I move in with my partner even if we’ve only known each other for a few months?
Most of the time, even the most beautiful pro and contra players don’t help. But that’s no reason to despair, because difficult decisions are still something nice (or maybe because of it). Provided, of course, that you know how to use them:
The be-all and end-all of wise choice
1. There is no perfect solution
Difficult decisions are often so difficult because there is no unquestionably rationally “better” option. There is no point in collecting more and more information and making long lists. So looking for the perfect solution only makes you unhappy, because it doesn’t exist!
2. Head AND heart are important
In the end, we don’t decide on something because we objectively found more advantages than disadvantages. In the end, our values on certain topics (desire for independence, security, variety, etc.) are decisive – and they are different for each person. So once you’ve found out for yourself what kind of person you are or want to be, the decision should be a lot easier.
3. Be the author of your own life
Decisions give us the opportunity to actively determine how we want to shape our own lives. We invent ourselves. That’s actually something beautiful, even if it doesn’t feel like it at the moment. In retrospect, it is always better to have made the decision consciously than to simply wait or hand over responsibility. How we choose makes us who we are.