A young mum has posted a message on social media after receiving derogatory remarks from her husband. The latter accuses her of “relaxing at home” during her maternity leave.
The arrival of a baby can be very upsetting for new parents. You have to adapt to a new routine, accept that sleep time will be greatly reduced while trying to keep time for yourself and your couple. Although, let’s be honest, this last stage is not the one that most occupies the minds of parents during the first months of the baby. In any case, maternity or paternity leave is not relaxing, and no, it’s not a vacation! However, mothers often suffer unpleasant remarks about maternity leave…
For a young mother, it was from her husband that the disparaging remarks came. So she sought out some support from other mums by posting a message on the private Inner West Mums Facebook group. And they were particularly shocked to discover the behavior of her husband since the birth of their baby. He is only 5 months old but the dad already allows himself inappropriate remarks, completely obscuring the mental load that the mom undergoes on a daily basis!
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“He describes my life as ‘relaxing at home’ while he goes to work.”
Even if the young mother did not put the word mental load on what she undergoes, it is clear that it is. She tells : “I’m on maternity leave for a year and he’s been working hard for our family. He does all the cooking (to avoid our death), but I literally do everything else, including washing the dishes he used to cook dinner. I don’t feel like I’m relaxing, especially since our baby hasn’t slept for more than four hours in a row since birth. And I do 100% of the nights since I breastfeed him.” Despite everything she explained, the mother is not sure that her anger towards her husband is legitimate. Especially since she added that when her husband comes home from work, “He’s taking a nap on the couch despite sleeping over 8 hours a night. I want to take a nap too but I can’t fall asleep during the day when I’m alone”. Fortunately, in the comments the other moms gave her a lot of support and comfort!
With more than 120 comments under the publication of the young mother, we can say that her message caused a reaction. Internet users offered him solutions: “Make him an offer: on Saturday he stays home with the baby and you leave.” A mother even recalled something important: “Your husband is on “break” when he is at work. If you were trying to outsource what you do in a week, you would need to employ three people, full time, seven days a week. A person to do the housework and cleaning and two nannies, a day shift, a night shift. Remind him that his contribution could easily be replaced by a home meal delivery service.” What to relieve the mom who seemed to need it badly…
Parenting writer
Zoé is on a work-study program, she joined the aufeminin team in September 2022, she writes for the parenting section. Committed and curious, Zoé likes to write to advance…