here are the 10 key steps to finding “the right person”, according to a marriage expert

Finding love, a desire that all people have deep within. If love is a wonderful feeling that very often makes people dream, it can bring a lot of joy and happiness to everyday life. This is why finding love or even THE right person with whom you will share your life is a sweet desire, but which is unfortunately not so easy to obtain. In some cases, meeting the person who will thrill you and make you happy can be a major challenge while requiring a lot of time and patience.

Fortunately, experts and other dating coaches are there to help us and guide us in our search for love with a capital A. It is with this in mind that we have already discovered the prohibitive behaviors that close the doors to a second date, but also that a matchmaker who has married more than thirty couples reveals her 10 tips for finding the ideal person in your eyes.

Fix What You Don’t Like in Your Life First

You need to know that you are the person better placed to fix what is wrong in your life if you don’t like it. To be ready to welcome a new person into your life, you need to be a good companion yourself. The expert explains: “ when you are emotionally disordered or confused, your love life will reflect mess and chaos“. It is therefore important to find your balance whether at the mental, social, financial level, or even at the educational level: “Practicing self-care is essential to looking and feeling your best and loving yourself “, explains Diana Kirchner, a psychologist from Florida, before continuing “happy, healthy people have better relationships. »

Don’t leave your passions aside

The expert explains that before finding love she complained to her therapist that her boyfriend didn’t make her happy, to which he responded: “Love doesn’t make you happy. Make yourself happy. Then you will find love.» Indeed, to be willing to meet the right person it is important to feel happy in your life and what better way to do that than by embracing your passions. She explains : “People who pursue their dreams attract their partners more quickly, when mating, different species show their health and virility in different ways: a peacock displays feathers; male rams fight to show dominance; humans know they’re showing ambition, and motivation can be seductive.»

Head towards profiles different from what you think you like

This technique was proposed by the dating sitePlenty of Fishto its subscribers with great success. If, for example, you are used to going towards people your own age, try to broaden your search to people 10 years younger and older. A professional matchmaker explains: “Real estate agents often say, “Buyers are liars,” to insist on what they want in a home, and then fall for the opposite. It’s the same for singles“. She then adds: “Sometimes they get stuck, repeating important criteria from their past over and over again. But if you’re older, divorced or widowed, your needs change. This may no longer matter if you share religious, political, financial, or co-parenting attitudes. Sometimes the only cure is to break everything”she says.

Recycle an old romance

Is there a person from your past that you miss? Don’t waste time and check social networks to see what happened to her and if she is single today. Seeing an ex again can be a double-edged sword, in some cases you can remember why you separated and in other cases love can blossom again between you. This is not the case for Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez who found each other almost 20 years after their first romance?

Use your social circle

Ask your parents, your friends, your siblings, your colleagues, let it be known that you are alone and looking for love. You may find yourself facing some superb surprises!

Call a professional

Are you able to call on a recruitment firm to find you the best profile for a specific position? In love, it’s the same! Some people specialize in improving your profile on dating apps or social networks, as this dating coach explains: “Dating apps can seem robotic, depressing and addictive. Anonymity encourages bad etiquette. There is impatience, self-sabotage, and mistakes that single people make. We hire people to get help with our hair, our wardrobe, our public speaking. Why not with love? Get help from a pro to identify your blind spots — style, first impressions, social etiquette. And present yourself in a better light.»

Be open to advice from those close to you

If you do not have the means or the opportunity to hire a coach to help you, do not hesitate to seek advice from those close to you, but above all to listen to them. The expert uses her own experience as an example: “I told my boss who spotted me with Charlie (her husband): “He’s smart and nice, but not my type.” She replied: “Your guy is neurotic, self-destructive and not interested in you. Go out with him again.” A remark which will have allowed a second chance to be given to the one with whom she built her life.

Refocus your expectations

There’s no point in getting stuck in an idealized relationship. For example, if you dream of a relationship like Romeo and Juliet, be realistic and look at it for what it is: a three-day relationship between a teenage girl and a young man that resulted in more than six deaths. A psychotherapist advises not looking for someone who checks all the boxes, but instead looking for someone you can imagine writing a story with.

Reduce your checklist and sarcasm

Try to reduce your list of criteria to find in your partner as much as possible, the expert advises not to exceed three essential characteristics. “It’s not like a restaurant menu where you order someone of a certain height, background, education and profession» explains the professional. Open your mind to have the chance to love.

Leave your couch

Even if teleworking is popular and everyone likes to stay on the couch, that’s not how you’ll find love! Go out, go to parties, singles events, volunteer, go to the gym,… just live and then you will have the opportunity to meet the perfect person for you.

The people? A whole world! Passionate about the media, networks, series, films, and investigative investigations of all kinds, it was natural that Jessica turned to writing and that she takes…