Contrary to popular belief, this woman sees infidelity as a way to save her relationship. She explains why.
What is the key to lasting as a couple? Some will say communication, others passion (like Paul who “completely” reinvented his sex life after 28 years). For Gilly, it’s infidelity! A private detective gave his tips for spotting an unfaithful partner. Even when everything is going well in your relationship, two reasons still often lead you to cheat on your lover. And if that wasn’t synonymous with a breakup but on the contrary would save his relationship ?
In the Mirror, this 47-year-old woman living in Inverness in Scotland testifies in this sense. She got married 21 years ago. But after 10 years, his love story deteriorates. She and her husband are constantly arguing, particularly because of their sex life. He didn’t satisfy her from that point of view and she felt that she was putting pressure on him. “No one wants to feel like sex is a chore, it’s the complete opposite of what it should be – fun!”, explains Gilly. She then started dating other men, and this saved her relationship.
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Infidelity: the key to a lasting relationship?
On a whim, Gilly began flirting with other men. If she doesn’t think about the long term first, she ends up meeting her lover. Seven years ago, she met this 45-year-old married man looking for the same thing as her, while remaining committed to their respective partners. “The passion is still there after all these years. We see each other for sex when we can, and it’s always a thrill”. She describes this passion: “Sometimes it’s naughty in public places, and other times it’s in our homes or in hotels, but it’s always passionate”. Their organization is simple: “We also see each other for dates like any other couple. It’s like a completely normal relationship without the boring parts.”. They see each other when their schedules allow: several times a week, once a month…
For her, it is unrealistic to think that one person is capable of satisfying us on all levels : sexual, stability, security, conversation… Having a lover is therefore a good solution: “I think allowing yourself to love more than one person helps you appreciate them more because you focus on what they give you, not what you’re missing.”. Her desire for adventure is fulfilled by her lover, and her husband offers her stability and security. “It is to him that I would entrust my life”, she summarizes.
Gilly confides that she still has sex with her husband, but no longer puts pressure on him, she who describes herself as a person “really sexual”. But she did not tell her husband that she had a lover. She uses the excuse of working late or on business trips to see him. “It may be controversial, but I don’t see why I would need to do it”she explains. She doesn’t see a problem with her lifestyle “: Our marriage works perfectly since we have been together for a very long time. I really enjoy spending quality time with my husband rather than the daily grind”. But Gilly admits that you have to be careful, her husband almost discovered her affair several times. She advises being organized and having a good memory, to avoid making mistakes.
Then the Scotswoman concludes: “It’s a bit of a taboo for women to take control of their sex lives, but I would honestly recommend women to do it more. Do something for yourselves, ladies“.
Editor for Aufeminin since 2022, Charlotte is passionate about cinema, French and international, and a fortune reader. Curious about everything, she talks as much about personalities as…