3 reasons why he cheats on you even though he loves you
When a partner cheats, it is assumed that something is going wrong in the relationship. Other reasons are more often the cause – you can see the most common triggers in the video!
When you find out that your loved one is cheating on you, a whole world collapses. And self-doubts are not long in coming: Why am I no longer enough for him? What’s wrong with me? How do I have to be so that he is loyal to me?
Why does someone become unfaithful even though they are happy in their partnership?
As a rule, it is assumed that something is wrong with the relationship when someone is cheating – that he misses crucial things in his partner, that love is gone or that sex is a disaster.
Therefore, a couple who want to save their relationship after the breach of trust often see a therapist to find out what the unfaithful partner is missing in the relationship and what urgently needs to change in order to be faithful in the future.
Source used: archive material
When the only problem is someone cheating …
But the American sex addiction expert Robert K. Weiss writes in Psychology Todaythat it is often not because of the relationship or the betrayed partner when someone throws himself into an affair. In his nearly three decades as a sex therapist, he has had countless clients who assured him that they love their partner and that the relationship is wonderful – even the sex. The only problem is that they are cheating on their partner and cannot stop. But why are they doing this?
Three reasons people cheat in fulfilling relationships
The most common reason for infidelity is the desire to experience and rediscover yourself. As a result, affairs are a search for a new (or lost) identity. “For these seekers, infidelity is less a symptom of a problem than an experience that enables growth, discovery, and change.”
For these people, secret sex means exploring a part of themselves that has never been experienced or has long been suppressed. They want to escape their limitations for a short time – to feel young and carefree again, to experience themselves differently and to grow as a result. When such partners cheat, they are not looking for another person, but for themselves (or at least some long-ignored aspect of yourself).
2) The attraction of the forbidden
Some clients have said that they feel like teenagers when they are having an affair. For them it is exciting and appealing to break rules: the forbidden apple tastes twice as good.
The American sex therapist Jack Morin describes this phenomenon with the following erotic equation: Attraction + obstacle = excitement. For teenagers, crossing borders is a way of experiencing self and the world. The same can be true of unfaithful adults.
3) Allowing suppressed feelings
Men in particular were often taught to suppress emotions as children. In doing so, they learned not only to stifle their grief, but also their joy. For such people, an affair is less sexual than one emotional release, in which forbidden feelings can be allowed.