When you were four years old, you heard your mother say about you: "Manuela was a bitter disappointment for me. I wanted a boy so much." What did that do to you?
I certainly didn't understand this sentence as a four-year-old, but my mother kept repeating it. And because she herself was disadvantaged as a girl, she passed it on to me without thinking. With the saying "Your brother can do better than you", she permanently put me in a competitive situation. Even when I received the Federal Medal of Merit for my volunteer work in 1999, she still said: "Well, I could not imagine that you would be more than your brother." Then I thought, mom, you don't want to understand it.
Did that create a I-show-you page in you?
Yes. My mother involuntarily showed me a good way. I was literally asked to prove to her every day, you are not right. Girls can do anything. And girls are just as smart as boys. That made me brave. My mother thought I was inflammatory, defiant, and rebellious.
What encouraged you as a child?
Fortunately, my grandparents always believed in me and loved me as I was. Pippi Longstocking also encouraged me. My first book, and then I immediately encounter a girl who has no parents and to whom nobody prescribes anything. Pippi is full of strength and confidence and made it clear to me that you can shape your life yourself.
Her divorced mother decided that you should leave school at 14 to start an apprenticeship in retail and to earn a living. Did she ask that of your brother?
When the question arose with my brother, we were a little better financially. He was allowed to go to junior high school. He later studied on the second path of education.
"If I wanted to find my own way and go consistently, it was necessary to leave the nail bed of my childhood" – so your drastic words …
I moved out at 17 because it was so stressful at home, I was looking for a way to independence and married my first husband at 19. I am grateful that I found the energy at the time to endure things and to go my own way. I had to learn to act on my own responsibility.
Have you ever been able to speak to your mother?
When I was in my early 40s, I invited her for a weekend. With the request: I want to understand why you did this to me. How was your childhood? How did you experience the war and how the injustices between men and women? What is the package that shapes your life? My mother agreed to this and I have to say that it was one of our best weekends. The most emotional anyway. I understood a lot, we got so close. I also had a session with my father later. It is a great gift when parents get involved.
What has challenged you the most in life?
What I asked for the most was getting up after a defeat. Especially after this maximum failure …
You mean when the company you started with two partners in your mid-20s went bankrupt because one of the co-owners misappropriated money? And suddenly you were separated from your husband, with debt, without a job and without an apartment …
Certainly my low point. But also setting the course for another, very good way. Failure is actually only a detour.
At that time, you noted three goals: You wanted to work in a large corporation with educational opportunities, be financially independent and purchase a condominium for retirement provision. Today you are the deputy chairwoman of the supervisory board at Beiersdorf AG. You became a professor because of your long lecturing experience. Without Abitur. Without studying. You used to be afraid to stand by it …
If you have the title of professor, it makes sense that someone asks, what did you study? In this respect, I kept getting explanations. Then to answer that I don't have a degree is a little – well – unusual. When I first stood in public, it was like coming out for me. And it was received extremely positively.
Her book is called "We need women who dare". Have you ever thought that you are talking too openly about yourself?
I had a lot of respect for murder before going public and making myself open with so much openness. I was afraid that something negative could come back to confirm my self-doubt. But an acquaintance said: "That's exactly what you've shown courage with." In fact, the book is a great gift to me at this point in my life. I couldn't have written it when I was 40 or 50. This required a certain level of maturity and the necessary distance.
What hurdles do the young women you coach as mentors have to overcome today?
These women start full of energy after they graduate from high school. But soon they will arrive in reality and meet the classic stereotypes. Men are still preferred or promoted faster. For women in their late 20s, it says – well, she'll get pregnant soon. So at some point they hit the glass ceiling. I can only advise my mentees: If you want to be promoted, go up as quickly and as far as possible. Otherwise you get stuck in a simple or medium position if you come back after giving birth and want to work part-time.
Then career is hardly possible.
It is a dilemma that family issues are still largely on the shoulders of women. If I could wish for something, part-time and parental leave should become more masculine. Because then the companies would have to do it differently. This is a great opportunity for men to free themselves from the classic role of sole earners and to bring new, additional aspects to their lives.
What other problems are the mentees coming to you with?
Many of them suffer from a kind of overwhelming because they think that they have to fulfill their parents' wishes and dreams. Reflecting on what both parents have given, what suits the personality and gives strength, but what also blocks, makes it easier to find your own way. Then I recommend speaking to the parents: How do you actually see me? What if I don't meet your expectations? After that there is a chance that something will change in the relationship.
They advise women to make themselves visible, to establish themselves as a brand.
A brand is characterized by its recognition value. The same applies to a person in professional life. Think: What do I stand for? What do I want to stand for? What are my skills with which I can score? Competence, credibility and sympathy – that is what defines a brand.
Can you perhaps explain this to us using your example?
For me, this is certainly my pronounced social behavior, because I have always volunteered in the company. I was able to box through a cultural event for the employees on the board, which has been taking place four times a year for over 27 years now. 400 colleagues come every time, they experience me as host and initiator. That creates visibility. Even when I volunteered to chair the sports community near Beiersdorf – with 2400 members today – it increased my profile.
The Rousseau brand stands for …
Rousseau stands for: It stands up for the employees. It is socially committed. It is responsive. She is one of us. That is probably also the explanation why I was re-elected five times as a member of the supervisory board.
MANUELA ROUSSEAUS book "We need women who dare" has been published by Ariston-Verlag.