Mailboxes to fight violence

To put an end to the weight and the price of silence is Laurent Boyer's wish. He created the association "Butterflies", the fruit of his own history and the testimonies received following the release of his book "All the brothers do like that", in 2017.
“I was raped by my brother from the age of 6 to the age of 9. He was 10 years older than me. I wanted someone to help me. I was hoping for an outstretched hand, but I was unable to ask for it because I was unable to say what my brother was doing to me. Unable to hear me say it out loud ”, says the founder of the association. “On the other hand, I managed to write it down, in a sort of diary. There were two places where I was waiting for someone to help me: my school and my football club ”, says Laurent.

"It is all these years of silence that end up suffocating us"

After keeping the secret for thirty years, Laurent finally found the strength to free himself. “It is all these years of silence that end up suffocating us. This is why I have this fierce desire to allow child victims (of all forms of abuse) to free their words so that they can rebuild themselves as quickly and as possible ”, he says.

To free up children's voices, the association has set up letter boxes in schools. “School leaders and teachers are very favorable to this device, because it offers a new way of freeing the spoken word through writing. It is a device that does not exist anywhere else ”, he confides. Unfortunately, the association is sometimes met with refusal. “Things are sometimes more complicated with the Academic Directions which are much more cautious and which oppose us the fact that we do not have accreditation. However, we do not need approval for what we offer ”, he laments.

Since 2020, twenty mailboxes have been deployed in schools and 24 in sports structures. “We have many, many words already”, he rejoices.

Themes related to harassment, sexual and domestic violence

In these establishments, a letter box is always installed in a place known to children. “But not necessarily at a high traffic area, such as next to the infirmary, near the head of the establishment's office, when leaving the changing rooms or toilets in sports facilities”.

An initiative that is bearing fruit. The children leave their note where they confide on the incivility they suffer at school from their classmates, school bullying “Which is a very strong problem”, sexual and intra-family violence. Once the words are dropped, volunteers come by at least twice a week to do a check. “When this is the case, the mail is sent to a dedicated email address within the association ”.

Two schemes are then considered depending on the nature of the word. “Either it is the subject of worrying information that we send to the CRIP (Cellule de Collection des Informations Preoccupantes) of the department concerned, with the word”, He emphasizes.

Either the word is sent to a volunteer so that a solution can be found internally with the support of the headteacher and the various national education stakeholders such as school nurses and school psychologists. “The head of school, national education therefore, is always aware, secondly, of the words deposited. It is important for the children to have confidence in the fact that their mail will be correctly treated that it is the association which collects the mails ”, he says.

"Children write to us about their discomfort, whatever it is and whoever their aggressor is"

When the little words concern acts of incest, justice was immediately seized. “The Prosecutors have been seized and we know that, following these words, investigations are underway”, emphasizes Laurent. “Children write to us about their discomfort, whoever it is and whoever their aggressor is. Their words are clear ”, he concludes.

Each year, more than 165,000 children are victims of rape and sexual violence. Also, 700,000 children are victims of school bullying, or one in ten children.

Thanks to Laurent Boyet for his testimony. To discover & support the association, go here.