What can mothers do to regain their strength? Journalist Katharina Nachtsheim explains how we manage to think more about ourselves and to be more selfish in some things.
Dear other mother, you know what your child’s favorite Pokemon is, which teacher’s birthday is when, why there’s another row in the 4a and when the soccer tournament starts next weekend.
You are thinking of regularly providing the in-laws with new photos of the kids, writing Christmas cards to the flute teacher, checking the change of clothes in the daycare center and making an appointment with the orthodontist.
You really are amazing – you juggle so many balls in the air at the same time, you are a multitasking genius. Aaaaaaber: When was the last time you did something just for yourself? When was the last time you asked yourself what is actually good for you? I bet it was way too long.
Too often mothers lose themselves
In everyday life with children, we mothers too often run the risk of losing ourselves and just being "the mom of". Especially now after all the exhausting months with home kitaing, home officeing and homeschooling, it is so important to take care of ourselves. That's exactly why we have "WOW MOM – the mom-encourager for more me in all that we" written. This book should encourage you to pay more attention to yourself again, to think about what you still want to achieve, how you want to shape your life.
Because as the saying goes in the airplane: In the unlikely event of a loss of pressure, put on the oxygen mask first, only then do you help children. So it means: You can only be there for others when you are doing well.
Hence 5 points how you can manage to be more selfish again:
- A busy schedule is far from being a full life. This saying is from Kurt Tucholsky and means: Dare to say NO. To things that rob you of more strength than bring you energy. To people who take advantage of you, to the umpteenth parenting spokesperson. As is so often the case, less is more!
- It's ok not to be ok. If you are not feeling well, you just need a break: take it. Nobody can just walk around smiling. Admit weakness to yourself!
- Swearing: The mother's equivalent of hugging manager trees. Your children make you angry, and so does your husband? Then say that clearly! Stop swallowing everything, but stand up for your needs.
- We cannot give 100 percent in our job, 100 percent as a mother, 100 percent as a partner. Otherwise we will be a 300 percent wreck. It doesn't have to be perfect, good is enough. You can cheat your way, give 80 percent, go the easier way.
- You can't unlearn cycling. Neither does your brain forget how you were before the children were born. So dare to go for it: What made you happy in the past? What was your passion, what were your dreams? You can have both: the best of your life as a woman and mother.
The journalist Katharina Nachtsheim (38) has three children and lives with her family in Berlin. Along with Lisa Harmann (37) she runs one of the most successful parenting blogs in Germany – the blog magazine STADT LAND MAMA.
In her book "WOW MOM: The mom encouragement for more me in all of us" The mom bloggers describe how mothers don't lose themselves in everyday family life.