I recently "broke up" with a friend. She is nice, it wasn't that. But she was one of those people who are hard to avoid. Not even temporarily. Because a "do not report" was always friendly, but just as concrete immediately. Uff … it was exhausting. Obviously too exhausting. And zack, she was gone.
I find people … ok. So some.
In general, I notice that I am no longer so easily inspired by people I meet, and even if I am enthusiastic, it does not mean that I am looking for long-term contact with the person. Sometimes I wonder how that happened. How the relationship-hungry networker could become such a sluggish anti-Uschi. Am I feeling cold? Have I become anti-social? I don't think it is. In truth, I'm just smarter.
Why we are more skeptical when we get older
The thing is: I just know more than I used to. I know that at some point 58 acquaintances can no longer act. I know that people often present themselves differently in the beginning than they really are. I know that people have demands on you if you don't keep them at a distance. And I know that my capacities are finite. As normal as all these things sound to me, which I have long passed the age of 30, such thoughts are so absurd for young people. In our youthful "easy-sense" we found everything exciting, great, thought everything was possible and some people for gods. That was great, no question about it. But it was also simply a misjudgment. With today's knowledge, we would not have thrown ourselves into life as we did. That's why it's good that we haven't had it yet.
People are human. And I'm not everyone's friend
Even though it sometimes feels like this, I am certain that we have not become worse people just because we no longer want to be everyone's friends and everyone thinks we are friends, just because they share an interest with us. We are just more experienced and can differentiate ourselves better. What do we need thirty friends and acquaintances for when we know whose opinion counts for us anyway? Why should we offend our really important people just because we have promised XY, Hinz and Kunz another after-work beer, a birthday party or a girl brunch? But above all: how about justifying ourselves, overwhelming ourselves with thousands of "super important people" in our lives, whom we could no longer do justice to. It is really good news that we no longer immediately find everyone super great and declare them a potential Best Buddy. It is a sign of wisdom, strength and right priorities. God knows, getting older doesn't just have disadvantages.