The former champion of the 12 Coups de midi releases a book* in which he describes his daily life as an autistic Asperger. In Autism: the little ghost hunter, broadcast Wednesday, November 2 at 12:30 a.m. on LCP, he takes the opportunity to focus on the world around him.
Why did you write this book?
PAUL EL-KHARRAT:To restore some semblance of truth. Life is far from easy for me. I wanted to express my emotions, which are not always rosy, but also a dull anger and a darkness inherent in my condition. I am not only the smiling and kind Paul, but someone attacked and, sometimes, aggressive. I want the whole planet.
Did it make you feel good to write?
Yes. Even if it tired me a lot to do this introspection. I was not there to write about myself in good, but only to bring a stone to the building of the understanding of myself. There have been some censorships so that people don’t feel attacked while reading it.
How do you currently fit into the very disturbed world around us?
I do not like him. There is a burning desire in me for a total suppression of this world to build a new one. For example, I stopped visiting psychiatrists. I don’t mean to generalize that they are all idiots, but those I have met I have found to be incompetent and cowardly. I recently decided to take myself in hand by going soon to see a competent psychiatrist, in order to express to him all my cerebral activities, so that he has the tools to understand me and help me.
What has your notoriety changed in your relationship with others?
It’s generally superficial, but it allows me to tend to a semblance of joy, good humor, joviality. This is particularly the case with my participation in Big heads. At the moment, I can’t be friends with people. I am friends with one person, me.
Not even with Jean-Luc Reichmann, the host of 12 noon shots?
Why would I be friends with Jean-Luc Reichmann? We haven’t spoken to each other for nearly a year for all sorts of reasons that I won’t reveal. I have no direct or privileged contact with this man.
Do you now have more with Laurent Ruquier?
Yes of course ! I am at Big heads regularly, and I also took part in holidays organized with members. All this allowed me to have rapprochements with Laurent Ruquier that I never had with Jean-Luc Reichmann, with whom we never left the teacher-student relationship. It was a pathetic pseudo-family, a semblance of good relations between individuals. A kind of societal hypocrisy.
We will therefore no longer see you in the special broadcasts of the 12 noon shots?
We are not on the trail of redemption, indeed. I don’t want to take another step towards an individual who has annoyed me for reasons that I prefer to keep quiet. I don’t want to be attached to anyone anymore. I belong to no one.
*Welcome to my world: me, Paul, autistic Asperger’s, Ed. Harper Collins
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