During pregnancy, your own body and psyche always get a little out of hand. But what if the whole world around you is turned off its hinges?
Our third child was born in June. At the same time, according to projections at the time, the health system was threatened with collapse at exactly this time. "Just be glad that your little one is safe in your stomach for a while," said my midwife. "June will be fatal," my sister, who works in the hospital, prophesied. "There is no danger to pregnant women," wrote the press. "There is currently no data," said my gynecologist. I read reports about infected newborns, births without a partner and a pregnant woman in Bolzano whose health only improved after an emergency operation. UFF.
While all these different impressions were dancing salsa in my head with my hormones, I was stuck in the home office with the kids trying to function as best I could. Going crazy doesn't do anything. Said my husband.
The thing about the lack of stability
Unfortunately, in some moments, what my husband says doesn't really interest me. To be honest, I've rarely felt so unsettled. My body went off the rails, I would soon go from a very fulfilling work life to maternity leave and my everyday life would be completely upside down. Digesting this is probably a bit difficult for every pregnant woman – regardless of how much you wanted the child. What then helps are routines, a stable environment, looking forward to the future with the newborn, and a little rest. So all the things that were possible before Corona and are no longer possible.
How I found my courage after a bad weekend
Then there was this weekend. Even before Ms. Merkel came up with the idea, I had my personal shutdown. All you had to do was look at me and I would cry. Everything in me was fear. To my baby To my parents with heart disease. To my sister with a genetic defect. Around the world we know How the birth will be and how I should protect my newborn from what's to come. It took me two days to cry with snot and water until I thought of a sentence my grandma once said to me: "Life consists of 10% what happens to you and 90% what you make of it." And it occurred to me that now I had the chance to teach my kids this exact phrase. Yeah, maybe even the kid in my tummy. As a vaccination against despair in life, so to speak. Even prenatal. Resilience via umbilical cord express.
The stomach does what the head says
It's not news that you can outsmart your gut and feelings quite well. For all new moms-to-be, practicing this now is VERY, VERY smart. Because *** ATTENTION, SPOILER *** with children and without the usual seven hours of sleep, even without Corona, your nerves will sometimes be bare. A good method: mantras. Just keep repeating in your head how you deal with things. Over and over again. Later it may be: "Wax painter will definitely get out of my favorite blouse, so I don't get upset", today it is: "Corona will not spoil my anticipation for my child." What also helps me: Just skip the thoughts of the birth and the time before it and call the other images to mind: those little perfect fingers that hold on to you. The chuckling sound when your baby drinks. How okay quarantine will feel when you can finally see your sweetheart. Or the conversation at the kitchen table in 30 years' time, during which you can say: "You have become such a strong person because the 2020 crisis did not hold us down, my dear. You were born a fighter and you will achieve everything in life!" How to do it … staying optimistic in tough times … you can never learn that early enough. Our children in the womb in times of Corona just stop before they are born. We will all emerge from these times as mom heroines. And our children? They will definitely be optimists!