10 things i thought about mothers before i became one myself
© Shutterstock / Ollyy
A child turns life upside down? Blogger Nathalie Klüver always thought this sentence was a mess. Until she became a mother herself and had to quickly revise her prejudices.
Such a child can turn everything upside down. I never would have thought. But that’s how it is. I always thought the sentence was babbling. Life goes on. And you’re still the same person – think! This is one of those sentences that I had to delete from my repertoire very quickly when my first child was born. And there are a lot more of these phrases that I thought about mothers before I became one myself …
Top 10 – what I used to think about mothers:
- 1. Parental leave is awesome! Finally a year of vacation, not having to work, sleeping in, drinking a latte in the café, going for a walk every day – and time for things like photo books, writing a book and so on …
- 2. She could at least have cleaned up a little before I come. Quickly clearing the dirty laundry out of the way once can not be that difficult.
- 3. Madness, it doesn’t bother her at all that she has baby puke on her shoulder! And it bothers her even less when she wipes the snotters away with her hand and then wipes her hand on her pants. That’s a bit gross.
- 4th Does she have to stare at her cell phone all the time while we’re in the cinema? The children are with dad, what should be there?
- 5. Why does the child actually wear a snowsuit in the middle of May? Why doesn’t the mother mind?
- 6th And why does the child have sunglasses on in the evening and also the wrong way round?
- 7th It is impossible for her to let her child go to kindergarten in their pajamas!
- 8th. I don’t understand how one can talk about the child’s diaper contents without being asked. And what the hell is a sideways fart ?!
- 9. Children really don’t have to have something to eat in their mouth all the time. As a mother, you have to be consistent at times.
- 10. Gummy bears are really not for a one-year-old!
- And as a bonus: As a mother, how can you seriously say that your own child is annoying ?! You can’t be annoyed by your own child.
Today I am no longer surprised about anything.
The mother of the child in kindergarten has been wearing the same sweater with the same pap stains for four days? It will have its reasons. The mother yells at her child, whether it can finally just stand still while she ties the shoes? She gets the most understanding looks in the world from me. The woman at the cash register reaches for the surprise eggs in exasperation, tears the foil off before paying (!) And stuffs the chocolate in the raging two-year-old’s mouth? It’s good to see that it’s not just me.
The truth about the prejudices is often only understood afterwards
Yes, and I can also have conversations about breast milk stool, spilled diapers and the healthy appetite of my two children, and I even have fun doing it. I know my way around nursing pads and all brands of porridge. I’ve learned my lesson about consistency – and how difficult that is. That it is actually an impossibility. I appreciate it when the children sleep at least until 8 a.m. on weekends. And almost every day I actually catch myself rubbing the remains of breakfast off my children’s faces with spit on my fingers!
And to those of you who have no children, I can only say: Just don’t ask when you see me in town with an almost four-year-old who has his scarf tied around his head like a turban, wears sunglasses even in the dark and has closed his jacket on his back. We have our reasons.
Text by Nathalie Klüver, originally published on vollnormalemama.wordpress.com.
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