Sometimes our bodies urgently want to tell us something – but we don’t listen. We talked to a therapist about the power of suppressed feelings and the symptoms by which we can recognize them.
We haven’t had an easy year. And it’s the second time we say that. The beginning of the 2020s was for most people – one is inclined to say almost everyone due to the pandemic situation – a turbulent time. Some got through the changes better, others less well. One thing we can say with reasonable certainty, however, is that they have shaped us. Just as different stages of life, pandemic or not, always do.
However, we often notice the influence of external factors with a time lag. We live, but only feel later. In extreme situations in particular, you keep hearing people say they are “okay”. Because then the body is too busy working. What starts much later is the processing. For that we need rest. If this never comes, it can happen that we always suppress or repress feelings because they do not suit us at the moment. This process often only happens subconsciously. However, we can consciously feel the symptoms that can indicate suppressed feelings. Because sooner or later, whether we like it or not, they make themselves felt.
Andrea in front of the forest is just feeling this “later” in her practice. She is a therapist, coach and psychological consultant in Hamburg and is currently receiving a lot of visitors: “In the practice, more people now appear than during the entire Corona period,” she tells me in our conversation. This is hardly surprising for them, because we are only now coming to rest: “Now the post-processing happens.”
The power of suppressed feelings
We want our interview to be about the power of repressed emotions. At the beginning, however, we will discuss something fundamental, on which we should base every assessment of symptoms: Serious and permanent complaints belong in a doctor’s office. “A good doctor would always take both into account – physical and psychological causes,” assures Andrea vorm Walde. Because of course all physical causes should always be excluded before they are assigned to the psyche.
If an organic disease is excluded, however, it can be worthwhile to listen to the body better. In particular, people who are always fixated on performance instead of preoccupying themselves with their mental life tend to suppress feelings, Andrea explains to me. It would often hit those “who are trimmed for perfection”. Or those who care more about others than themselves.
But how do I know that I have something to work on? Andrea distinguishes between her patients: especially between physical and mental complaints.
Physical symptoms
“Often physical feedback actually comes. And one must not forget: the body does not respond until very late. You don’t have a problem yesterday and tomorrow your body says to you, ‘Hey, something is wrong here’. First of all, the soul would try itself to make itself noticeable. If it is overheard, the body comes, “says Andrea. His calls for attention can be expressed in numerous symptoms. She calls the “full range” of:
- sleep disorders
- Back pain and headache
- Tension
- Abdominal pain and
- fatigue
Sometimes, by the way, you can catch yourself formulating your own complaints: “Neck pain, for example – you always say ‘I’ve got something on my neck’, that’s actually the case there is something in the stomach. These are all old realizations that the body reacts to certain things, “explains Andrea.
Mental symptoms
Then there is still the emotional side. Changes in mood play a role here: “Classic emotional signs would be feeling more sad and other mild, typical symptoms of depression,” says Andrea and mentions the following:
- sadness
- Loss of drive and motivation
- Lack of concentration
- forgetfulness
- anxiety
Just because you experience these feelings from time to time doesn’t mean you are deeply depressed. However, mild, depressive moods can appear quickly – and are also easily treatable if you devote yourself to them, reassures Andrea. By the way, she recommends seeking professional help for this. If you realize early enough that something is bothering you, you can talk to a friend or your partner about it. “But if at some point you notice that I can’t sleep through any more. I always have a headache. Then you must be aware that what weighs on your soul has been playing a role for years,” she explains and advises one Psychotherapy.
Regardless of this, you can – and should – do something good for yourself. Things like exercise and fresh air are elementary. With the classics, such as gratitude diaries, yoga or sport, you should listen to your gut feeling whether you really enjoy these things: “For a perfectionist, for example, it becomes just another stress factor to have to do it in the evening”, warns Andrea and encourages her to find her own way. Movement can also mean dancing to your favorite music in the living room: “These are all small things that are worth getting up for.”