Psychology: 5 decisions you never have to explain to anyone

There are some decisions we have to make – but we don’t have to justify them to anyone. This one, for example.

Hardly any of our decisions bind us for our entire lives, not even big decisions like choosing an education or saying yes at the altar. Of course there are decisions that have long-term consequences and that lead us into situations that we can only adapt to with great effort. But most of them we can at least reverse or change to some extent.

When making any decision, we don’t have to think: This is my one chance to do it right or wrong. Life is a combination of trying things out, gaining experience and learning. For most big decisions, we don’t need a complete pros and cons list or a perfect comparison of all the possible scenarios that result from the different options. What we do need, however, is a feeling. One that is strong enough to prevail over our worries and doubts, and one that we have the courage to trust.

When it comes to making decisions in life, our feelings are often the best guides. And as is often the case with emotional matters, we don’t have to justify them to anyone.

5 life decisions you don’t have to explain to anyone

1. What career path you choose

Most of us are subject to a variety of external influences when choosing a career: the example or wishes of our parents, trends in our circle of friends or in society, practical feasibility through aspects such as financial means or a limited availability of training places. With all these stimuli, it is not that easy to find out and recognize what we actually want and what career we can imagine for ourselves. Therefore: If we happen to be in the fortunate position of feeling and knowing which path we want to take, we do not need to explain it to anyone or convince anyone to follow our feelings. If we do not feel it, it is also okay to take the easiest path at first and change direction when we realize it or after the trial and error principle.

Our career has to suit us and our concept of life. That can mean that it is very varied and challenging, that it offers us as much stability as possible and demands little from us, that it is fun, fulfilling or largely irrelevant as long as it feeds us. No one but us can know or even decide which career model suits us. That is why we don’t have to explain it to anyone if we don’t want to.

2. How to shape your relationships

Just as with the way we shape our professional lives, the external influences that affect us in the area of ​​relationships are often so strong that we hardly realise that we have a choice. The tradition of looking for a life partnership and then often developing it into a family has been tried and tested for thousands of years and therefore appears to some people to be the only option. But it is not.

In order to be healthy and happy, we need personal, reliable relationships, but none of them has to be a classic partnership. Likewise, not only one of them has to be a partnership. If you feel constrained in every relationship or have never wanted a relationship, you can just as well invest your love and energy in your circle of friends without doubting yourself in the slightest, and if one relationship is not enough for you, you can have several. No one else has the right to judge our relationships – or to demand an explanation for them.

3. What you take time for

We live in the age of information, as it is sometimes so beautifully put. From politics to fashion trends and royal families to medicine, ecology and economics, there is an incredible amount that we could be interested in. In order to live a healthy and happy life, however, we are forced to ignore some of it. Simply trying to deal with all areas and be reasonably knowledgeable would mercilessly overwhelm us and prevent us from gaining experience. If, for example, we decide that following political discussions is not getting us anywhere and we are more interested in how life came to be on earth or what rules princesses have to follow when choosing their wedding dress, that is our business. It is not for anyone else to approve of.

4. What you believe in

Some people may think that we already live in a world where it is easy to believe what convinces us and what we can live with best. But that is not the case at all. Many people are told by their parents that they must follow a certain religious belief. Many other people are put under social pressure – through exclusion, prejudice, etc. – if they want to adopt or have adopted a certain belief. This is problematic because what we believe in is very personal and, above all, difficult to explain or justify. If we are lucky enough not to have to believe in anything but to be allowed to believe in everything, we do not need to worry about who we owe an explanation for our decision – because we do not owe anyone one.

5. What priorities and goals you set for yourself

Most of our decisions are linked to our goals and priorities, so it is particularly important that we are clear about them and decide on them as independently as possible. What does success mean to me? What is important to me in life? What do I find meaningful? How we answer these questions can change over the course of our lives, but we need answers to them – although they do not require an explanation.

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