psychology
These 5 mistakes are often made by chronically dissatisfied people
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Whether we are happy or unhappy with our lives depends on a variety of factors. But some mistakes are typical of chronically dissatisfied people.
“Everyone is the architect of their own happiness.” There is a grain of truth in this old saying – but it is also too simplistic. Of course, everyone is responsible for their own life and therefore also for how satisfied they are with it. But a number of factors play a role: for example, which country or city we live in, who we live with, whether we live our lives according to our personal values, what the weather is like, what the genetic makeup of our psyche is and many more.
We can influence some of these factors of happiness – but not others. The latter include whether we have a predisposition to mental illness or the environment in which we grow up. But we can certainly influence how we deal with problems and how we view the world. Some people make the same mistakes over and over again – especially if they are among the chronically dissatisfied people.
5 mistakes that unhappy people make again and again
1. Perfectionism
We need goals and plans for a long-term successful life. However, this can quickly turn into excessive expectations – of ourselves and of other people. We tend to forget that life is not perfect. Of course, we can and should work towards our goals and make demands on those around us. But we should not fixate on how certain things should look, but remain open and celebrate even small successes.
2. Materialism
The desire for security is deeply rooted in us humans. That is why we usually want a home where we feel comfortable and possibly a means of transport that takes us safely to our destination. But this desire for security can turn into a desire for status, recognition and excessive material wealth. People who define themselves primarily by their possessions will probably never be satisfied. Because there will always be people who have more.
3. Negativity
We all experience things that we don’t like. And of course we can say so. But dissatisfied people often have a tendency to complain. They only focus on the negative and lose sight of what they have and what is going well. It can help to consciously remind ourselves every now and then of the positive aspects of our lives. It’s okay to talk about the negative things from time to time – but the focus shouldn’t be on them.
4. Relationships with energy vampires
Many people underestimate how much our relationships can affect our well-being and mental health. They therefore often spend time with people who are not good for them and who drain their energy and nerves. Such energy vampires are poison for our happiness – because if we surround ourselves with negativity, it is even more difficult for us to concentrate on positive things. People who are chronically unhappy make this mistake particularly often and often fail to break away from relationships that are not (or no longer) good for them.
5. Focus on the past and the future
If your thoughts are mainly occupied with plans, worries and what-if scenarios, you will find it difficult to be happy in this very moment. The same applies to people who often brood over the past and are unable to leave resentment and other negative feelings behind. If you want to be happy in the long term, you should try to live in the here and now instead. Yoga, meditation or other mindfulness techniques can help with this.
Sources used: forbes.com, medium.com