Interrupt & Co.
Subtle behaviors that are more disrespectful than you think
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We often try to see the good in a person. In doing so, we ignore subtle signs that point to the exact opposite. Here we reveal which behaviors are more disrespectful than we initially assume.
Sometimes it can feel like the other person cares about us. Just wanting the best for us. But secretly he:she is out for the opposite, for his:her best. Takes advantage of you because you’re an excellent listener, for example. Or you are “good”, “useful” for the person for other reasons.
It is important to recognize this in good time. Otherwise, it will likely result in you giving a lot of your time and energy but getting little in return – an unhealthy relationship. What can you pay attention to?
5 subtle behaviors that are more disrespectful than you think
They downplay your performance.
Does the other person give you the feeling that you were just lucky? Others have or would have been able to do that too, you anyway? What you’ve achieved isn’t anything big? This can be extremely discouraging and cause you to become very self-critical in the future. Always remember that you have to be proud of yourself – that’s the main thing!
They make decisions for you.
At first glance it seems nice, as if the person you are talking to is supporting you, wanting to give you a hand. But is that really the case when he:she makes decisions for you? Isn’t it more likely that action will be taken in his/her favor? Especially if the other person always tries to change your mind even though you would actually like to decide differently, this shows disrespect. Pay attention to two typical sentences: “I wouldn’t have done it that way” and “Well, if I were you, I would rather do it that way.”
They often interrupt you and talk about themselves.
We’ve probably all interrupted someone in a conversation at some point. But if this subtle behavior becomes more frequent, it can be quite disrespectful – especially if the other person tries to make himself the subject of the issue every time afterwards. Many people feel valued when the other person confides a lot in them. But it’s always just about him: her, your need to talk falls behind. This is not how good communication should work.
They cancel spontaneously or are always late.
Anything can come up spontaneously. But even if someone has a seemingly good excuse for every cancellation, spontaneous cancellations and frequent late arrivals are disrespectful behavior. You actively take the time that you could otherwise probably use to do something else. A good friend would have to appreciate that and behave the same way – with exceptions of course.
You see no limits.
It is supposedly meant to be nice if someone immediately hugs you, touches your arm during conversations or wants to visit you at home. But if you reflect – non-verbally or even verbally – that the behavior of your counterpart exceeds your limits, your comfort zone, is the only right way to accept it. Any other behavior is disrespectful and intolerant. Listen to yourself and your gut feeling here.