psychology
7 signals help you recognize whether you should fight for a person
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Sometimes it’s not that easy to decide whether we should fight for a relationship or a person or not. The following signs can help.
As hard as it is to let someone go and give up a relationship, we have to do it sometimes, after all, we can’t be there for everyone. Our time and energy are limited, and we should devote it to the people in our lives who give back and do us good.
Especially after a relationship has ended, it can be difficult to stick to the step and the decision to separate: Was it really that bad? Can’t we perhaps save our partnership if we both work on ourselves? Maybe we just need a break? Such doubts are legitimate when we banish a person from our lives, and sometimes they also prevent us from making a mistake and giving up too quickly… But how, apart from our intuition, can we ultimately determine whether someone deserves it that we fight for both of us or not? The following signals speak loudly “In any case, “Psychology Today” is for being different from a person to finally distance themselves.
7 signs you should NOT fight for someone
1. “It’s all your fault!”
Conflicts and relationship problems always involve two people – but if one of them is not willing to accept that and puts all the blame on the other, they cannot be resolved. If someone shows no insight or willingness to admit their guilt or mistakes, there is only one thing left for you to do: give up!
2. Me, me, me
The person can give you their perspective on the situation in detail and impressively, but makes no attempt to be interested in your point of view? Then save your effort and empathy for less self-centered people – because that person doesn’t deserve it at this point.
3. Mice become elephants
Regardless of whether it is a friendship, partnership or family relationship, if every small discussion or disagreement turns into a big argument with door slamming and drama, you are obviously two people together who neither do well nor understand each other. Life is too short to make an elephant out of every mouse – so in this case you better make the mosquito… er… fly!
4. Always the others
“She said…”, “if he had been earlier…”, “in this chaos you can’t…” – anyone who has excuses or blames others is not taking responsibility for themselves Act and will not work on yourself to improve a relationship. In that case, you’d better take responsibility for both of you – and draw a line in the sand.
5. Misguided emotions
Your partner or friend cries over a series but shows no compassion when you’re going through a hard time or have your period? Sorry, but then he doesn’t deserve you to share anything with him at all.
6. 180 degree turn
If a person undergoes a major personality change, for example from initially being tender and sensitive to suddenly becoming aggressive and cold, it is not your job to spend a lot of time researching the causes. Sure, people evolve and change, but if the change is so drastic (and negative) that you can’t understand it through mere sympathy, there’s no point in fighting for the relationship – because how would you want one so unpredictable Still trust the person in the future?
7. Victimhood
You keep hearing how hard it is for XY? How rarely was he or she hugged by his father and how often fate puts broken pieces in his or her path? We all have our difficulties and problems, but we have to deal with them. Anyone who always sees themselves in the role of victim and does not want to take responsibility for their own life is not able to have an equal relationship. Trying won’t make you happy.