“Quiet dumping”
The nasty trend to end comfortably
© Goran / Adobe Stock
Having a clear separation conversation is a challenge for many people. Some people prefer to postpone ending the relationship because of this.
Quiet dumping has its origins in the world of work
The term is known from the working world as “quiet quitting”. Employees stop getting involved and only do the bare minimum to avoid being fired. This method can also be applied to dating life.
Instead of a conclusion, there is a slow and painful end
After the exciting phase of getting to know each other and the first milestones, the butterflies in your stomach have disappeared. Passionate touches and loving words turn into listless looks and comfortable routines. Internally, one party has already finished the relationship and is losing all interest in investing any more time. Instead of seeking conversation, the person closes himself off and waits until his partner puts an end to the relationship.
These are the clearest signs
In particular, the changed behavior clearly shows whether the person in question is gradually distancing themselves from the relationship. The interest in spending time together becomes less and less and soon only the other party is trying to find moments of togetherness. If a planned date does happen, it is often canceled at short notice. In addition, there is often a lack of longer conversations about the relationship and the future together.
“Your partner decides to do the bare minimum to be with you without breaking up with you. […] “They’ve completely lost interest, but they don’t want to be the ones to end the relationship,” said TikToker Dan Hentschel in his Quiet Dumping video.
That’s why quiet dumping is used
There is no general reason for this, but in many cases there is no malicious intent behind it. Rather, the partner is of the opinion that he or she is protecting their former favorite person from the pain of a sudden end to the relationship. But as they distance themselves more and more, the other person despairs and tries to save the relationship.
This is how you protect yourself against quiet dumping
If your favorite person suddenly changes and the spark is gone, you should listen to your gut feeling and seek direct confrontation. Reveal your feelings and don’t let yourself be brushed off with simple excuses or justifications. While the possible consequence may be a breakup, you may be able to protect yourself from further and prolonged pain and uncertainty.
Sources used: focus.de, ajoure.de, id.vice.com, psychologytoday.com