The other night, I had the bad idea to find out if there were any Asian supermarkets that delivered at home. Why bad idea? Quite simply because it whetted my appetite. 4 am is not the best time to sit down to eat.
A well-planned routine
This is how I discovered a YouTube channel, which left me very perplexed, that of Honeyjubu. In very aesthetic videos, this woman shows us her daily life, which seems entirely dedicated to the well-being of her husband, her children and her dog Lucy. After some vague research on Google, it appears that this is a relatively recent fad in South Korea. Students, housewives or mothers – yes, apparently, they are mainly women – stage their daily household life, all with little or no dialogue. Their faces appear rarely or not at all and she does not speak.
Thanks to the magic of YouTube, no need to learn Korean to enjoy these videos and the term is well chosen in the case of Honeyjubu since she puts herself on stage, cooking. Notice to amateurs: avoid watching them on an empty stomach. The other half of the videos feature her doing housework or walking Lucy. In short, we found the Korean version of Bree Van De Kamp.
But where Desperate Housewives was a satire of life in the American suburbs and the women who populate it, the Honeyjubu channel is to be taken at face value. Knowing that taking care of your home is something enriching and rewarding. This type of chain has even had the honors of the New York Times, which sees it as a way to rediscover its interior. It is true that after two years of epidemic and two confinements, we absolutely needed to dive back into its interior.
Staging and partnerships
There’s a mesmerizing side to the videos and let’s be honest, there are some interesting household tips to glean, not to mention the cooking recipes. What is the problem ? After a few videos, we begin to perceive certain details: an absolutely perfect kitchen, filled with household appliances and utensils, which do not come from a discount store. The chain has clearly indicated brand partnerships, particularly for luxury appliances. They are not available in France.
I couldn’t determine if Honeyjubu lived in an apartment or a house or what city she resided in, but the size of the kitchen, bathroom, and dining room clearly suggests that there are square meters available for this family of at least four people. Apart from utensils and appliances, all food products used are fresh. It does not come from a bag of frozen foods from the supermarket, but from a fruit and vegetable seller, a butcher and a fishmonger. Seen from France, and without knowing the social, historical, political and societal context of South Korea, one has the impression of a very bourgeois and above all very traditional staging.
Mothers of families who create blogs or cooking or household arts videos, in France, Europe and the United States, there are tons of them. I myself am quite a fan of certain publications, especially when I lack inspiration in the kitchen. Until then, it had never bothered me. Perhaps because I had only consulted content intended for people in a situation quite similar to mine: very manic, very in a hurry and let’s say it openly looking at my budget. So what’s the problem ? In a word: reactionary.
Back to the past
The first video I saw featured Honeyjubu getting up at 5:30 a.m. to cook her husband’s lunch. Immediately forget the peanut butter sandwich dear to our American cousins or our hexagonal butter-pickle ham. In Mr. Honeyjubu’s lunch box, there is rice cooked to perfection, spring rolls (in fact, a rolled omelette would be closer to what we know here) and sautéed pork with freshly minced vegetables. She is then seen taking care of the dog, then preparing dinner. The latter is composed of a chicken, with vegetables, in the oven as well as a porridge of abalones. She concludes by saying that it is not a special day, but a normal day.
What is really embarrassing is that, unbeknownst to her, she is promoting a certain way of life: one where women stay at home, to take care exclusively of the well-being of their husbands, children and of their dog. However, the chain being monetized and having concluded partnerships with brands, in particular LG, we know that it earns a living. Probably less well than her husband, but she has cash flow. However, the staging also makes us understand that she is watching her budget. On some housework, she uses certain products, not for ecological reasons, but for financial reasons. In a way, it feels like we’re back in the 50s.
Is it a problem that women prefer to stay at home to take care of the household? No. If it’s really a choice. However, according to Info Social RH, the participation of women in the labor market in South Korea is only 56.2%. Between the ages of 30 and 40, they are strongly encouraged to leave their jobs to devote themselves to domestic work. In Europe and the United States, conservatives are on the rise and women are in their crosshairs. Since the debates on marriage for all, all the television channels have welcomed editorialists, who, under the guise of commenting on the news, take the opportunity to distill their retrograde vision of women. And since we are never betrayed as much as by our own, these are women who share their archaic vision of the role that women should have in our society.
Long road
Obviously, this is pushing very far the analysis of a YouTube channel run by a housewife who may be trying to emancipate herself through her domestic talents. But seeing a woman get up at 5 a.m. to cook her husband’s lunch, while he’s probably still sleeping, irritated me. Coming from a country still steeped in patriarchy, where it is considered absolutely normal for a woman to work a double day (work and home), I admit to being very touchy on this subject. Given the success of the Honeyjubu channel, I’m obviously the only one to be embarrassed. Have our mothers or grandmothers really campaigned, demonstrated, taken legal risks, so that the 18-25 year old generation consumes YouTube videos on the art of being a good wife and housewife? And blame those who are older?
To see Honeyjubu get up at dawn, to prepare good meals, clean the bathroom every day, polish her kitchen utensils, chop vegetables, dust, all with a smile, we almost feel guilty not to do the same. You women reading this, why don’t you get up at 5:00 a.m. and cook a nice, restaurant-worthy breakfast for your husband? Why don’t you dust every day? And your bathroom? Do you wash it with plenty of water every day? Without forgetting to play sports to keep the line, to go to the hairdresser, to pick up the children, to bring them to extracurricular activities, etc.
Basically, therein lies the problem with these YouTube channels. These are not innocent videos that will help you in your daily life, but make you feel inferior. Contrary to what the New York Times writes, these are not relaxation videos, but political propaganda videos.
As for my possible youngest readers, who are still wondering what they will do in life, I will give you only one piece of advice: make sure you never depend on anyone. Neither from your parents, nor from a spouse, nor from an employer. Your freedom is what you hold most precious.