Resilience: advice from philosopher Frédéric Lenoir to overcome an ordeal: Femme Actuelle Le MAG

From the book A wonderful misfortune, by psychiatrist Boris Cyrulnik, the word resilience has entered our familiar vocabulary. From latin resilientia, which means to bounce back, it originally referred to the physical ability of a material to withstand a shock, or even to return to its original shape. By extension, psychological resilience consists of taking action on a trauma, upheaval or mourning, not to regain our initial state, since the event will have transformed us, but to rely on resources, pre-existing or unpublished, put in place. to overcome it. While our benchmarks are shattered in an uncertain world in the very short term, the philosopher Frédéric Lenoir, author of Live ! In an unpredictable world published by Fayard, opens the resilient way for us to gain freedom despite the obstacles.

How to strengthen oneself in times of crisis?

Frédéric Lenoir. We have known since Spinoza that every living being needs security in order to grow, progress and improve. Otherwise, its vital power and action diminishes. This philosophical intuition is proven by neurologists. In the face of crises of existence, such as the one we are experiencing, we therefore seek to preserve our physiological and psychological security. In order for life to continue unfolding on this basis, for there to be the possibility of a rebound after a shock, certain resource qualities – which have been proven to work during confinement in those who cultivated them – allow the life to unfold, to the inner freedom to grow, that is to say to enter into resilience.

What are our resources?

F. L. When we can no longer rely on the outside to organize our life, when we are placed under unusual limits, the first form of compensation is to turn to other pleasures. By giving intensity to all of our actions, even the most everyday, we increase our power to be. Medical imaging observes that the quality of our attention and our presence in even the most mundane action reactivates the brain neurotransmitters that generate emotional balance and happiness at the highest level. This teaching, well known to meditators, artists and mystics, has been experienced by those who have best experienced confinement.

Can we get out of an ordeal on our own?

F. L. Trials confront us with our vulnerability. We realize that we are not sufficient on our own. Social media, and it is not always the case, played a very beneficial role during lockdown, especially if we were selective in our relationships. Because all resilience is based on the quality bonds that nourish our mental balance and its vitality. Let's keep this discernment, which is a key to resilience.

The exercise: say yes to life

To say yes to life, according to the Stoic philosopher Epictetus who made it the condition of happiness, is to focus primarily on what depends on us.

  • Wanting to intervene on what does not depend on us, said Epictetus. it is adding moral suffering to psychic suffering. So, in order not to suffer twice, let's start by distinguishing between what is up to us and what is not, and act on what we can change or improve. Thus, we regain our freedom of action.
  • To live fully, that is to say to strengthen our quality of presence and attention, do only one thing at a time and really do it. When we listen to music, we become one with each note, when we are at the table, we turn off our cellphones, when we play with our children, we do not think about our work, for example …
  • This state of presence, which gives a new dimension to things, provides well-being, amplifies our vital breath and relieves us of the weight of too much worry. It encourages us to get involved, it is a vector of mutual aid. It takes us away from ourselves. So we stop going around in circles in our inner weather to look to the beauty of the world and take care of it.

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Resilience: why are we not all equal in the face of hardship?

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