In her beauty column, entrepreneur Sylvie Meis reveals personal views on the subject of beauty. This time she talks about perfectionism and explains why the statement "Sylvie, you are perfect" has a bitter aftertaste for her.
"Sylvie, you have the perfect life" – a sentence that I regularly hear from my fans on Instagram as well as from people in real life. Perfectionism appears to many of us to be desirable, but this is a goal that we will probably never achieve. Because none of us is perfect. And that's nice too! Rather, we should try not to be afraid of mistakes and instead celebrate not being perfect.
Because of my mistakes and my stories, I am who I want to be today: a proud mother, a passionate wife and an ambitious entrepreneur. I wouldn't be all of that if I had been “perfect” all my life. Instead of striving for perfectionism, I prefer to try to be the best version of myself.
This statement has a bitter aftertaste for me
Now I could still take it as a compliment when people say to me: "Sylvie, you are perfect". But mostly the statement also has a bitter aftertaste, a critical undertone that sometimes even hurts me. Often I have the feeling that I have to justify myself why my life is actually not perfect.
Today, at almost 43 years of age, I have reached a point where I am more satisfied with myself and my body than ever before. I am in harmony with myself. But it is no secret that for this well-being I also train several times a week, sleep a lot and eat healthy – I also do without some things. This is something I would never hide from my fans on Instagram. It is important to me that people see that there is always hard work behind a supposedly flawless body.
I feel very comfortable on the couch as well as on the red carpet
Although Instagram and the show biz often suggest the opposite, we always have to keep one thing in mind: This is a world that lives from aesthetics and beautiful things. In my opinion, that doesn't mean that it is unnatural because of it. I celebrate both the glamorous red carpet events with elaborate make-up and the cozy moments with no make-up with my husband on the couch. And in both moments I feel really good.
And that's how I see it on Instagram: My profile consists of photos and snapshots that I find beautiful, that correspond to my aesthetic sensibilities. And these are not just the moments on the red carpet, but also the quiet, unvarnished ones at home. Both are, however, only parts of my life, not the entirety.
Why I like to show myself without make-up on Instagram
When sharing photos on Instagram, I listen to my gut instinct and I recommend that to you: Post what you feel like, what feels good. So if it's the photo with cellulite or no make-up – do it! For example, it makes me very proud when I show myself without make-up. Because without make-up, my slightly almond-shaped eyes appear, which I owe to my grandpa – he was half-Indonesian.
But: Of course there are also photos that I wouldn't necessarily post on social media because they bother me or do not correspond to my aesthetic perception – and I think that's totally fine. Because that doesn't mean that I don't accept it or that I love myself less because of it.
For example, I have an unsightly spot on my leg that is noticeable during underwear or bikini shoots and always has to be covered.
It's a scar that was caused by an accident in the sea in Ibiza. The waves were so strong that day that I was thrown against a stone with my leg and bleeding and had to be carried out of the water. Unfortunately, it left an unsightly scar – but it's not that bad. It now symbolizes a story from my life.
Everyone of us has a bad day
And I also know these days when nothing sits well: Sometimes my hair doesn't want the way I did or I slept badly and look tired. Sometimes only one thing helps: Staying in bed – hahaha, of course that is not possible! We shouldn't hide under any circumstances. Because let's be honest: we all have a bad day.
What I would like to give you at the end: Put the focus and your full attention only on you and what is good for YOU. Do not orientate yourself on general ideals of beauty or criteria that are typically "perfect", but set your own standards. This is how you manage to take yourself as a role model and set realistic goals. Enjoy even small steps and don't rush into anything, because being the best version of yourself is an ongoing process. Nobody is perfect, but beautiful in their own way. You are too!
Much love, your Sylvie