No matter what type of relationships you have with your loved ones, it’s important to know these three types of trust. We explain why.
Trust is one of the foundations of our relationships. Whether with a member of our family, a friend, our spouse or a work colleague, it constitutes the basis of a healthy, safe and solid relationship. Maintaining and building trust takes time and effort. Knowing the other person, agreeing to be vulnerable with them and trying to understand them better allows for deeper connections and emotional intimacy. However, there are several types of trust. According to therapist Jason Vanruler, there are three in particular: observation, verification and experience.
What are the different kinds of trust in your relationships?
Observation : this is the first level of trust that we develop towards someone. It involves devoting time and effort to carefully observing one’s actions. The trust we place in him develops as we are confronted with his behavior. We begin to believe in him based on what we see. It’s the same for us. Our conscious actions can make us trustworthy or untrustworthy.
The cheking process : This is the second level of trust development, which involves asking for information and testimonials about the person from other individuals we trust. This allows us to be reassured (or not) at the idea of granting him or reinforcing our trust. This is why it is important to surround ourselves with people who can guarantee our good faith, our credibility and our value.
The experience : This is the type of trust that develops when we begin to have experiences and share emotions with a person. How someone makes us feel when we are with them can go a long way in strengthening our bonds. But to increase this experiential trust in our relationships, we must strive to prioritize honesty, trustworthiness, and empathy.
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What’s difficult is that we often place experiential trust in people early on, without thinking about the magnitude of that decision. However, if something challenges or breaks this type of trust, it can be very difficult to get it back.
If you’re struggling to build real trust in your relationships, start with what you can actually do: observing and checking. Understand that “Experiential confidence is more of a feeling that comes when you have done the first two levels well”concludes Jason VanRuler.
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