There are some things you should avoid saying during a relationship argument, but two words, in particular, should be avoided at all costs.
There are ways to “argue well”. And there are things you should absolutely avoid if you don’t want to make the situation worse. When tensions begin to be felt in a couple, for one subject or another, the discussion can quickly drift towards other recurring points of contention or, on the contrary, repressed for a while. In an article, Cosmopolitan rightly warned against words that can sometimes go beyond our thinking and degenerate the situation. So, even if it is sometimes difficult, you have to choose the words used during an argument.
“Never” and “always”. While these words may seem trivial, their impact when spoken during an argument can be far greater than you might think. “You always forget to do the dishes”, “you never make an effort”, “you are always late”, in short, if you indulge in generalities during an argument, they are rarely all right. fact true. For example, yes, he sometimes thinks about washing the dishes. Exaggerating can not only hurt your partner, but also lead to a new argument. So to avoid this, Cosmopolitan offers more nuanced adverbs. For “never” and “always”, we therefore prefer “often”, “rarely”, “sometimes”, “a little”, etc.
The principle of non-violent communication
These tips flow from the Nonviolent Communication (NVC) process. While it is sometimes inevitable to argue, especially with the person who shares your life, certain tools allow you to calm relationships and resolve conflicts. Developed by psychologist Marshall B. Rosenberg in the 1970s, it is based on four fundamental principles: any situation must be able to be observed without judging others; everyone must learn to express their own feelings; express their needs; formulate what is expected of the other. NVC mainly allows you to open a dialogue and express your feelings while understanding those of the other. A method that can be useful in the middle of a couple crisis.
Article written in collaboration with 6medias