On Twitter and Instagram, many mothers and pregnant women have testified to the traumatic events they had to experience alone due to the Covid-19 pandemic.
Being pregnant during the Covid-19 pandemic is a real ordeal. Because of the health measures put in place to avoid the spread of the virus as much as possible, many women experience the unique or traumatic moments of their pregnancy… alone.
In some countries, the presence of the partner during ultrasounds or when the mother begins labor is still not allowed. A situation that isolates future mothers, at a time that can be very distressing for them. It is all the more difficult for those who are going through a tragedy, such as the loss of a baby or a miscarriage.
A hashtag to express their distress
On Instagram and Twitter, Internet users were able to see the hashtag #ButNotMaternity emerge. One way to denounce the conditions in which women experience pregnancy and childbirth in times of coronavirus. The hashtag gathered many poignant messages, testifying to the distress of the latter.
“I can sit and have lunch with my husband for over an hour without wearing a mask, but he couldn't come with me when I was told that our baby's heart was no longer beating. It's not ok ”, wrote a surfer on Instagram.
“Having a miscarriage is terrifying, it is physically and emotionally painful, but going through it in the midst of a pandemic on my own is something that has traumatized me for life. This week has been atrocious, to say the least. Driving to the hospital with a mixture of silent tears and cries of pain, to hear me come in, alone. Walk through the maternity ward, past people bringing their babies home to sit in a ward waiting full of pregnant women, alone. Staring at the ceiling, fighting the tears during my ultrasound to hear 'there's no sign of pregnancy, it's already over', alone. I walk through the delivery room to the emergency room to be told "your pregnancy test is negative". Only. Blood tests, internal exams, consultations and everything that I have been through alone. I went through it all, alone. The events of this week broke my heart, it was traumatic, terrifying and just plain horrible ", testified another mother on the social network.
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⚠️ Please read before commenting I wasn't sure if I was going to post about this, I still don't even really know what to say, but the more I think about it the more it's something I want to share. To cut a long story short last week I was pregnant, and now I'm not. I'm part of a club I never wanted to join, I am one in four. Going through a miscarriage is terrifying, it's physically and emotionally painful but to go through it in the middle of a pandemic, on my own, is something that has mentally scarred me for the rest of my life. This week has been traumatic to say the least. Driving to the hospital with a mix of silent tears and screams of pain, to be told 'you've got to come in on your own'. Walking through the maternity department, past people taking their babies home to sit in a waiting room full of pregnant women. On my own. Staring at the ceiling, fighting back tears during my ultrasound to be told 'there is no sign of pregnancy, it's already gone'. On my own. Walking through the delivery suite to the emergency department, to be told 'your pregnancy test is negative'. On my own. The blood tests, the internal examinations, the consultants and everything else I have been through. All. We. My. Own. This week has been heartbreaking, it's been traumatic and terrifying and just all round awful. This week has also shown me that I have a strength that I never knew existed, that I can do things I thought were impossible and that so far I have survived 100% of my worst days. Losing our baby is something that will never leave me and although I was still early, our baby was so wanted and already so loved. We already had plans for the future, we'd thought of names, nursery furniture, Stanley's big brother announcement, and to have it taken away from us so suddenly is something I'm struggling with mentally. I can't understand how we can go to restaurants, we can go to the pub and even to a shopping center but women like me are going through the hardest thing they've ever done, on their own. ? Please follow the link in my bio and sign the petition to help change the restrictions and allow pregnant women to have somebody with them for antenatal appointments and birth.
A publication shared by Shelby | Blogger & Influencer (@raising_stanley) Oct 20, 2020 at 10:42 am PDT
“Five months ago, I came home from hospital with an injured body, with stitches and bruises, and barely 8 hours of sleep in a week. This pandemic meant that I was alone in the hospital, my baby, alone, in another department and my husband, alone, at home (…) It was not easy. What makes things even worse is that today you can go to a pub, a restaurant, to the cinema, wherever you want with 5 friends, but a lot of women are still not allowed to have more from a birth partner or to receive hospital visits. They go to scanners and appointments on their own and potentially make life-changing decisions, alone, with no one to help them, yet in pain and very vulnerable ”, added a third.
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5 months ago I came home from hospital, an absolutely broken woman, with stitches and bruising, and barely 8 hours sleep achieved over the course of a week. This pandemic left me in hospital on my own, my baby in a different ward on his own, and my husband at home on his own. The lasting effects of that remain to be seen, but it wasn’t easy. What makes it worse is, you can now go to a pub, a restaurant, the cinema, anywhere you like with 5 mates but many women still aren't allowed more than one birth partner or visitors in hospital, are attending scans and appointments on their own and potentially making life altering decisions alone, without an advocate, while in a great deal of pain and very vulnerable. I was surrounded by many of these women when I was in hospital and so struck by the strength of each one – some had had C-sections (ie very invasive abdominal surgery), others of us had stitches, had lost a lot of blood, had been laboring for hours, maybe even days, were worried about babies in intensive care .. and all while having to figure out how to look after a whole new fragile person. Of course I think (and know) we are capable of managing on our own, but the fact is we should have a choice in the matter .. I really felt that new babies need their mums and new mums need someone too. This picture has been a constant reminder to me of what we can get through and that I am stronger than I think but tbh I wish I didn’t have to keep being reminded. Why is maternity care being left out of conversations around government guidelines? ? oh I wonder …….. please sign the petition, maternity care should not be a postcode lottery (link in bio) #fuckthepatriarchy #womeninleadership #maternity #maternitycare #butnotmaternity
A post shared by @ itskatyjane on Oct 9, 2020 at 11:23 am PDT
Being accompanied by your partner when you are pregnant is essential. They provide important emotional support to the mother-to-be and support them during difficult times. It also helps reduce fear and anxiety in pregnant women, which are harmful to both mother and baby. Living these events alone is therefore very traumatic. Today, these women would like the protocol to change in their country.
And in France ?
Since the end of confinement, the rules have been relaxed. A pregnant woman has the right to come with a masked attendant during pregnancy appointments and examinations. The partner can also attend the delivery from the active phase of labor, without the possibility of coming and going. However, it depends on the clinics and maternities, so it is important to discuss the subject beforehand with the health professionals.
Read also:
Coronavirus: childbirth with a mask, the ordeal soon over?
Coronavirus: what precautions should be taken for expectant mothers?
