Lessons from the little ones
This “childlike” quality makes for stronger relationships
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There is a difference in how children approach people and how adults do it. Do you still remember how you met your best friend as a child – and what are you doing differently now – to your advantage or disadvantage? We should definitely use this one trick from our childhood more often.
There is one trait that is particularly pronounced in children. That can make us smile or laugh and sometimes offend us… and that often weakens in adult life: curiosity. It is not only important for approaching the world with open eyes and finding the beautiful and exciting in the little things – it also helps immensely in maintaining and strengthening relationships.
What we should learn from children
Think back to an encounter with a (small) child. Have you perhaps been asked a lot of questions – for example in the charming but sometimes nerve-wracking “Why?” phase? Or was your hair suddenly grabbed or something else inspected about you because you were a new and exciting person for the little one? The curiosity that children show is a wonderful thing. And even if we shouldn’t necessarily make sudden physical contact with strangers in adulthood, asking questions and wanting to know are just as important for strong relationships.
Questions, answers and not knowing
Children ask a lot of questions because they simply don’t know the answers yet. We sometimes lose this quality as we get older. Interest in all the things around us becomes less. Or we don’t want to expose ourselves because we don’t know something yet. We may become numb to some stories from friends because we have already heard them – but good stories can inspire us in many ways if we get involved with them. We may no longer ask as often how things are going at work or in our love life. We are less interested in it because we have enough to do ourselves. But strong relationships are important for us and our well-being. Studies have already linked social contacts to a long life.
The most important lesson of childish curiosity
Not knowing something is totally okay! We should definitely learn this lesson from children. Encourage your curiosity and ask questions, no matter how banal they may seem to you. When in doubt, you will learn something new and show interest – and you will also be more active in the conversation. Questions are a wonderful way to keep a conversation going or break a silence. And in the end, we may understand something that was previously unknown to us – and can even tell others about it if we are excited by the knowledge.
Studies have suggested various benefits for humans related to curiosity. In addition to strengthened relationships, for example, curious people are happier and curiosity can also promote empathy, according to “Greater Good Magazine”. Curiosity makes life more interesting and exciting, it can show us things we wouldn’t have known otherwise – and make “boring” conversations more exciting. At least if we take the time to be more active and ask questions. It is not uncommon for fun facts to come to light that can become a nice memory of that person. So: ask questions, be open, accept what you don’t know or take up a new hobby for the love of curiosity.
Sources used: psychologytoday.com, greatergood.berkeley.edu, andersonuniversity.edu