this harmful phrase to absolutely avoid to preserve your relationship, according to a psychologist

Generally, Men and women often have difficulty communicating when it comes to understanding each other’s needs. Many men say they didn’t see it coming and are shocked when their partner decides to leave them… This often happens due to a misunderstanding or a misunderstanding that could easily have been resolved easily; And the words used in the context of an adjustment in a couple, particularly in arguments, often have the effect of aggravating the crisis within the couple.

And it only takes a single thing for communication between the two partners to suddenly deteriorate. During an argument, some words can be really hurtful. They create damage that is difficult to repair. A sentence has the power to cut short any exchange.

The risk of victimization

“Relationships are largely based on effective communicationrecalls Jennifer Gerlach in Psychology Today. No one has a perfect communication style, but certain habits can be particularly harmful.” But to establish quality communication, the psychotherapist recommends distinguishing between necessary communication patterns and those that should really be avoided.

Among the words to ban, the expert notes that there is one which generally puts an end to any possible dialogue in a couple. However, it is a sentence that may seem harmless but which has devastating effects on the communication between the two partners. This sentence is generally: “Don’t worry about mel”. But it also comes in different ways, we also frequently hear: “Don’t hurt me“, “You are hurting me” Or “You upset me deeply“…. This posture of victimization poses a problem according to the psychotherapist.

Blaming others to avoid conflict

This technique consists of appearing as a person in a weak situation, which cuts short any exchange. “This sends the message that the person cannot handle a given situation and that the person on the other side trying to communicate would be cruel to continue“ explains Jennifer Gerlach.

If this type of behavior puts an end to the argument, it does not allow the underlying problems to be resolved because the dialogue is stopped. Result: the understanding within the couple deteriorates more and more and this can lead to a separation. “People use guilt to avoid talking directly about a problem. This allows them to get what they want without having to engage in direct conflict“ explains the expert.

News journalist

A true jack-of-all-trades, passionate about travel, culture, society, people and beauty, Saliha writes for various media such as Escapade magazine, the GEOguide collection by Gallimard, Le Figaro…