this mom teaches her teenager that she has the right to have hair (and to keep it)

Yes, no offense to some, a woman does not have to shave. Removing hair is part of the long list of injunctions they face on a daily basis and defines, according to the company (rather the men in fact), an absolute mark of femininity. Spoiler: letting your hair grow and assuming it does not tarnish a woman’s femininity.

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On the parent site Scary Mommy, Jenn Jones, mother of a teenager, has decided to take up her pen to talk about a still taboo phenomenon, that of teaching young girls that they have the choice when it comes to their hairiness. “My daughter decided it was time to shave her legs. She was ready, especially since most of her friends showed up to school in shorts and freshly shaved legs. I told her that I supported her decision and that I would help her, but I also reminded her that she can do whatever she wants with her hair. Whether that meant delaying or never shaving, it was up to her to make that choice. ” Jenn therefore helped her daughter to shave, but to her surprise, several weeks passed and the latter never asked her to do it again.

Read also: They have stopped waxing and tell us about … the liberation

Maybe it didn’t change her life the way she hoped it would? Or did she decide it wasn’t that important after all. This episode made this mom remember what shaving her hair meant to her at the time, when she was the same age as her daughter. “When I was in middle school, one of the hallmarks of being adults was shaving your legs. You made sure everyone knew you did, choosing to wear shorts or a skirt no matter how cold it was outside. It was not considered socially optional. If you were a girl, you had to shave your legs from middle school. ” And indeed, during adolescence, the hair was something determining. A mark of virility in boys and femininity in girls who parted with it.

Give in to social pressure

Like the dictates of the “beautiful woman” conveyed by the media and brands, waxing is not only a mandatory criterion from the point of view of men, but also unites women. “You have to suffer to be beautiful, right?” “All women do it right?”. Jenn Jones recalls in her speech that when she was a teenager (this is where the injunctions really begin), she felt compelled to shave. “I had almost no hair on my legs, but I gave in to the pressure to fit in,” she admits. If you didn’t have a silk button-down shirt and didn’t shave your legs, what were you doing with your life? I ended up with gashed legs and occasional burns from the depilatory lotion that I left on for too long. It turned out that shaving the legs was not at all what it was meant to be. In my college mind, I thought that the slippage of the razor would magically transform me into someone more popular, more beautiful and more mature. ” And yet this mother of a family realized, like many, that shaving her legs didn’t mean anything, didn’t change anything, and certainly wasn’t going to do anything for her.

This is why more and more women stop waxing

Video by mylene.wascowiski

Today, she obviously understands the weight that social pressure can have on her children, but also suggests that they do not have to give in to it. She even encourages other parents to take part in this reasoning. “I hope that more and more parents will choose not only to kiss body hair – and any form of body positivity – but also to educate their children that it is okay not to change their bodies. ‘they don’t want it. Whatever my own children’s choice, I want them to also learn that they have no right to criticize a mate’s choice. We would all be much happier. ” We agree with her!

Barbara ejenguele

A journalism student, Barbara is currently doing a work-study master’s degree and writes on parenthood for the Aufeminin Maman, Parole de Mamans and Avis de Mamans websites. She is also …