Who doesn't know something like this:
- A critical comment from mom about our unhealthy lifestyle,
- a completely wrong opinion of the partner about the argument with our best friend,
- our sister, who completely ignores our problems on the phone
- or the colleague who sounds like we're not doing our job right.
In everyday life, we constantly find ourselves in situations where we feel attacked, hurt, insulted or otherwise trodden on our feet. That can really hit the mood, cost strength or, in the worst case, hit us so hard that self-confidence gets a crack. It can – but it doesn't have to!
With this thought trick you protect yourself from being offended
The author Seth Godin came across an interesting thought that brought him to the "Toddler Strategy": When a small child sticks out our tongue, throws food at us or in spite of "you are stupid, I hate you!" to the head, we would never have the idea of ​​resenting him or taking us to heart. We would peel the broccoli from our pants, maybe calm the child down or pull our way unaffected. Because we know exactly: The little one does not think so far that it could take our position into account.
It has its limited (children's) view of the world and is too busy dealing with its own impressions and problems to be considerate of others. And if we're honest: a lot there is no other way for us adults!
Adults only see the world – or a tiny part of it – from their own two eyes. And the problems and requirements that narrow and obscure your perspective are (from experience) much more extensive than those of small children. No wonder that even adults do not behave considerately and prudently at all times and that they occasionally (or often) step on the feet of others.
And that is exactly what we should call our attention next time, when mom, friend, BFF and Co. come back to us stupid. They live in their own little world and can therefore not see, know and consider many things at all. And there is nothing we can do about it – unless we can best educate them about our perspective. But at least we can protect ourselves and remember: The others don't want to hurt us any more than we do them! And yet sometimes it cannot be prevented – although of course there is nothing to be said against trying.