Sometimes we lack words, because of fright, because of perplexity – and sometimes for a good reason: because we are overwhelmed. Especially at a wedding, our emotions go on a roller coaster and we don't know where our heads are. And then present a marriage vows to the whole celebratory community? And anyway: How should all the love for the partner fit into a short marriage promise? And how can we best phrase it? If you don't have the words, we'll help you with practical tips and a few examples. So you can prepare yourself for it in peace – and then enjoy the big day more easily.
Wedding vows: in church or in the registry office?
"In good times as well as in bad" … At the wedding you promise to be faithful and to stay together until death do you part. But in addition to the classic promise, you can also make personal marriage vows. This can be done in consultation with the Registrars, the clergyman from the church, but also the speaker at a free wedding (e.g. when getting married on the beach – super romantic!). If you are getting married in church in addition to the registry office or if you want a free wedding, you can of course choose which ceremony you want to incorporate the vows into. With your contact person, you will then decide when it is best to present your personal vows in the planned process.
Also on one Wedding anniversary is a marriage promise a romantic gesture: What did you get through together, what do you still want to experience, what do you wish for each other?
Tip: Here you can find an overview of all wedding days.
Write marriage vows yourself
Phew, not that easy, such a self-written promise. Every beginning is difficult – but once you are at it and have brought some things into your consciousness, the words will soon just flow. To get started, it's important to think about your relationship, what it means to you, and what is important to you in the relationship. The following questions will help you:
- What do you love most about your partner?
- Which corners and edges do you love?
- What binds you together?
- What is your relationship?
- How do you complement each other?
- What similarities do you share?
- What do you wish for the future?
Writing vows yourself: a few tips
What does a marriage promise consist of?? One possible setup would be to start with an anecdote about your relationship and what it means to you. A To make a promise to the partner is also essential for a marriage vow (such as: "I will always be there for you","I'll bring you breakfast in bed every Sunday"or"I will do anything to make you laugh every day"…) – and finally to draw a bow to the beginning in order to round off the marriage vows.
How long should the marriage vow be? There is no template for this. You don't have to write a promise of epic proportions (even if you could of course say so many beautiful things about your partner and your love!). Sometimes it is good to keep texts short and focus on the essential points to concentrate instead of digressing and ultimately not saying what should actually be said. You can also agree on a certain type of text (e.g. funny, romantic, etc.) and any length.
What should I look for in a self-written marriage vows?? We have selected a few passages from the Bible and a few poems for inspiration – the romantic declarations of love from films also provide good assistance (you can find them in the gallery). It is important for you: Your marriage vows must honest and authentic be – and speak from your heart! Then it's no problem to speak through a quote, use it as a hook or somehow include it, as long as it suits you – you.
Wedding Vows: Inspirations from the Bible
If you want to include or open up verses from the Bible in your vows, here are a few nice verses:
- "Mighty waters are unable to extinguish love, and rivers do not wash it away." (Song of Songs 8,7)
- "From the beginning of creation, however, he created them male and female. That is why a person will leave his father and mother, and the two will be one flesh"; therefore they are no longer two but one flesh. What God has put together, man should not divide "(Mark 10, 6-9)
- "This is my commandment that you love one another as I have loved you." (John 15, 12)
- "Do not owe anything to anyone but love one another! For whoever loves the other has fulfilled the law." (Romans 13: 8)
- "For God did not give us the spirit of fear, but of strength and love and prudence." (2 Timothy 1,7)
Love poems in marriage vows
A short poem can get you started or give you the words you're so excited about:
It is said that everyone has their star.
I was out looking for yours in the sky.
When I closed my eyes I found him –
in my heart.
(unknown author)
I love you because I have to love you;
I love you because I can't help it;
I love you after a night sky
I love you by a spell
I love you as the rose her bush;
I love you, like the sun its light;
I love you because you are my breath of life;
I love you, because loving you is my being.
(Friedrich Rückert)
I am only aware of my soul in yours, my heart can never rest but on your breast! My heart can never beat but for you alone. I am so entirely yours, so forever yours.
(Theodor Storm)
Examples of marriage vows
There are various ways in which marriage vows can be incorporated into the marriage ceremony:
- Wedding vows by saying yes, you answer the questions with "Yes I do"or"Yes, with God's help"
- You speak the marriage saying to each other
- Combination of yes-word and (self-formulated) marriage vows
For example, a classic church marriage vow is:
"(Name of partner), I take you to my wedded husband / wife, I want to love, respect and honor you all the days of my life, in good and bad times, in health and illness. Until death do us part . "
This in turn is followed by the exchange of the rings, possibly with the accompanying word:
"Wear this ring as a token of our love and loyalty: In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen."
If you want to make your own vows, try to follow the tips mentioned. A vow doesn't have to be long to touch (and make you cry). Sometimes the simplest words and gestures are the best! These 101 reasons why I love you may get you started on the right words.
Here you will find even more romantic poems for the perfect declaration of love ❤️. And when you have finished your marriage vows, you can sit down at the wedding speech ?. You can find out what else to think about before the wedding in the checklist for the wedding – with a practical overview for the 12 months before the big day.