What helps if you are jealous of your partner’s child?



Anyone who is jealous is considered weak, dependent, dependent. But jealousy is a kind of early warning system.
Image: Ilkay Karakurt

Jealousy has a bad reputation – and then jealousy of a child? It is particularly difficult for new partners in patchwork constellations. And jealousy has a purpose. The Relationship Column “Love Better”.

“You’re the adult, can’t you be more reasonable?” When Konrad says this sentence, Lena feels confirmed: He loves his daughter Lily more than she does. How else is she supposed to explain that he stands idly by while the 10-year-old makes her life difficult? The couple met through a dating site and moved in together after a year. Konrad’s divorce was not long ago, and he shared custody of the child with his ex-wife.

Lena was not discouraged. On the contrary: Childless herself, she was looking forward to more intensive contact with Lily. At first everything went well. “But in the meantime, Lily is behaving more and more negatively towards me,” Lena complains. “She doesn’t let me tell her anything.” What is particularly bad for her: “When Lily is with us, I’m the fifth wheel on the wagon.” In the meantime, no children’s weekend goes by without a row. “You’re jealous of a child,” Konrad says indignantly. Lena doesn’t deny that at all. Both are considering whether separate apartments could be a solution.



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