What should feel easy in the relationship?

Does a relationship require work? Might be! But when you get on well as a couple, some things should feel easy. To name just nine examples …

Whether friendship, kinship or partnership, for relationships to work, we always have to do something about it and invest in them. Finding compromises, understanding, being reliable – living with others is not just about us and our needs, but also about them. In this respect, no relationship is really "easy", because no relationship lasts by itself. But when you harmonize well as a couple and have built a strong bond, at least certain elements of the partnership feel easy and effortless that cause headaches for some others. We are thinking, for example, of …

9 things that feel easy to happy couples

1. Cuddle

Do you know the problem of sitting cuddling with someone on the sofa, watching a movie and thinking about nothing but that the position is terribly uncomfortable for you and how you can change it inconspicuously? Dreadful! But the good news: This doesn't happen to couples who are well-rehearsed. Either they know in advance which cuddling poses work well for both of them, or they simply say or show each other how they want to sit or lie – without any sleepy arms, stiff necks and bruised shoulders.

2. Kissing

"I hope I don't have bad breath!", "My lips are not that soft at the moment", "Shit, your nose was in the way!" – Couples who are very familiar with each other do not usually worry that much. Whether right after waking up or having dinner with a Greek, happy couples kiss whenever they feel like it and have perfectly coordinated their style. And if something gets stuck or someone has eaten too much garlic, they take it with humor and don't worry about it.

3. Arguing

Nobody likes to argue, but anyone who grew up with siblings knows: There are simple, informal arguing and there are exhausting things that usually don't lead to anything and are totally unsatisfactory. Arguing in a harmonious partnership is usually of the former type. Those involved vent their anger, let their displeasure out, feeling bad about it, but somehow relieved afterwards …

4. Make up

… and are ready to be reconciled again. You don't have to make a big start to jump over your own shadow, don't be afraid of rejection, just take a step towards the other, ask for forgiveness and forgive.

5. Telephoning, texting, communicating

"Should I hang up now?", "Does he understand when I write it like that?" – Terrible when you put every word on the gold scales and have to worry about everything you say. Part of a happy relationship is that those involved can communicate easily with each other and sometimes say something rash without something being blown up. And if misunderstandings or injuries do arise, you clear them up, reconcile and learn from them.

6. Take space for yourself

In a harmonious relationship it is quite natural for those involved to do their own thing and to take time and space for themselves. You will not feel guilty about neglecting your treasure or fear that it will remove you from it.

7. Relax

In a happy partnership, you can show the other who you are and how you feel. You don't always feel the pressure to have to pretzel yourself for the other and to present yourself in top form. Stubble on the legs or cellulite on the thighs are no obstacles in a well-rehearsed team to get close if you feel like it, and they don't haunt your head while you are having fun.

8. Be honest

Certainly, even in harmonious partnerships, there are times when it can be difficult to tell the truth. But in everyday life, for example when it comes to expressing an opinion or criticizing, it is easy for well-rehearsed couples to be honest with one another …

9. Show feelings

… and to reveal your own feelings. Pain, anger, jealousy, disappointment – in a well-established relationship it does not require courage or overcoming to act out emotions because you trust your partner and feel safe with them.

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