Who imagines for a single moment Héloïse and Abélard exchanging text messages? What about using automatic replies to keep the conversation going? Not exactly the kind of lovers martyrs of the XIIe century, who have left to posterity a correspondence as rich as it is heartbreaking. The same could be said of George Sand and Alfred de Musset (XIXe century) or Maria Casarès and Albert Camus (XXe century). But not from Martin and his “girl” (XXIe century).
Comrade Martin, almost an adult, was dumped by means of a concise but meaningful message, to which he replied by drawing from the panel of pre-written proposals issued by his mobile phone. A projection just as brief but much less sensible than that of the young lady. “The day before, we got confused. The next morning she wrote to me: “It’s finish.” As an answer, I chose: “I am at the cinema.” »
What followed was masterful. She : “Is that all you care about?” » Him : “Good. » She : ” Are you kidding me ? » Him : ” Me too. Thanks. » Beautiful like Roland Dubillard. “I wanted to do the detached guy, but, in fact, I was devastatedsays the young man. I mistrusted words. » In this case, indeed, it is better to delegate the choice to the algorithms, which are impervious to emotions and only hinder the context.
Two peculiarities used by Jean and his friend Antoine to talk about everything and nothing. Rather nothing. Their favorite channel? LinkedIn, the social network for professionals in the profession. “We exchange memes theredescribes Jean. The recipient must respond with one of the proposed messages, usually “Thank you very much!”. The sender should return a silly emoji or a thumbs up. » And so on.
Reply “I love you”
A surrealist exercise at the crossroads of the exquisite corpse and automatic writing, whose ambition is not political. “We could make believe that we are multiplying experiments in order to demonstrate the vacuity of the digitization of relationships or the ravages of the uberization of epistolary exchangessays John. But as we are not following a course in anthropology of communication but rather that of a business school, finance option, we must recognize that it is just for kidding. »
Nevertheless, all this makes our apprentice trader think a little. From now on, when he receives a prospecting email “very heavy”he responds with a ” Thanks a lot. Have a good day “ taken from the available directory. “If the sender knows how to read, he will quickly understand that he is at least breaking my feetexplains Jean. If it’s a robot, it’s a bet that this moron will send me a “Thanks. You too”, which will betray it and lead me to block the sender. »
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