Young parents adapt according to the needs and emotions of their child, even if it means breaking certain injunctions from the medical profession, friends or even the family circle … which is ultimately not bad.
After the birth of a baby, parents find themselves inundated with advice to apply for the well-being of their little one. However, it is important to choose the way that is right for YOU for the development of your child and yours. There is no miracle solution to raising your infant, the important thing is to meet his basic needs: sleep, feed, drink, be clean, be able to communicate, develop at his own pace, be safe, learn, discover, observe, have fun, experiment, feel listened to, be surrounded by love …
There are no hard and fast injunctions in motherhood, all ways can be good, as long as they meet your baby's needs and are done for her good. Over time, you will find what is best for you, your family and your child. And if the classic method does not suit you, opt for an alternative that suits your lifestyle … regardless of the "This is not the way to do it" malicious from some.
I sleep with my child
Putting your baby to sleep alone is a personal decision that is up to parents, so that the baby is independent, that he finds his rhythm alone, but also to find a little intimacy with his partner. However, sharing the same room as a newborn baby can be reassuring for parents but also very practical. A baby may need to be fed up to three times a night. An American study in the journal Pediatrics also indicates that the child would have an easier time fixing his breathing on those of the parents, which would reduce the risk of apnea of the baby. In France, since April 1, 2018, parents have had a new health record in which it is recommended to "Place your baby's bed in your room for at least the first 6 months".
If you feel the need to have your baby close to you at night, no shame. But do not sleep with him in your bed to avoid accidents. Opt for a co-sleeping bed, a space-saving cradle that you can put next to your bed, to watch and feed your baby as soon as he feels the need.
I don't want to breastfeed
Future mothers quickly face this question: will I breastfeed or not? Breastfeeding is first and foremost a mother's personal decision, some women may find it easy to breastfeed, others may not like breastfeeding. Indeed, it is a practice that can be very painful and can sometimes be synonymous with drudgery. Some moms just don't want to do it this way, which is understandable. If you are unwilling or unable to breastfeed, you can talk to your doctor or midwife who will advise you on another solution.
If you don't want to or can't breastfeed, no shame. Each does as she can or as she wants. It is better to prefer a chosen and assumed solution than an imposed solution that will make you and your baby unhappy.
I don't just make homemade mash
At the dawn of 5 months, healthcare professionals recommend starting dietary diversification. And for good reason, your baby's nutritional needs are starting to change and breast or infant milk is no longer enough for him. It will then be possible to introduce cereals, vegetables, fruits and then meat in the diet of your little one. You can of course make homemade purees and compotes for your little one by boiling your vegetables in water, then mixing them. Once the mash has cooled, add rapeseed oil for fiber. But cooking "home" food for babies doesn't have to be.
If you don't have the time or the inclination to make your own homemade purees, no shame. There are small organic jars on the market that are perfectly suited to the nutritional needs of the little ones. He will be satiated with very good food… and you can use this time saving to play with him or cover him with kisses.
I don't wake my baby to check if his diaper is wet
Young parents tend to check their child's diaper regularly, and for good reason, toddler's skin is very sensitive to irritants such as urine, stools or maceration of wet skin in diapers.
If you don't feel like waking up at regular times to check that her diaper is dry, no shame. And it's completely understandable: it's best not to disrupt your child's sleep by waking them up in the middle of the night or in the middle of a nap, at the risk of ending up with a very grumpy baby. In this case, prefer his sleep by putting him in safe, comfortable and healthy diapers. Diapers you can trust like Lotus Baby Natural Touch (link) which contains 0% lotion, perfume or dye in contact with the skin and which provide 12 hours of protection.
I carry my baby often against me
We say a lot “don't wear it too much” “don't keep it in your arms all the time” “baby needs to spend time alone” “let him cry a little”. Your role is also to open it up to the world, to make it discover the outside world, to help it flourish and grow surrounded and serene so that it can later (much later) go towards autonomy.
If you need or want to keep your baby close to you often, no shame. You love having your baby close to you on a walk, but also when you are vacuuming or going to water your garden. This is very good. Just be sure to choose a sling or baby carrier that is appropriate for your weight or size. In a baby sling, baby's joints and muscles are called upon to develop on their own. Baby's sitting position also helps work his back and neck. If this is how you feel good, it is very good. And enjoy this moment as long as you can, it won't last very long anyway.