More and more women are now turning to midwives for their gynecological follow-up. Lack of listening and empathy, verbal or sexual violence … All of them have good reasons for having abandoned their gynecologist for a midwife.
For years, I saw a gynecologist before a friend finally said to me, "But why don't you go see a midwife? You'll see, it's much better!". Neither one nor two, my appointment is made a few months later. I have never liked the sometimes icy reception of gynecologists, and their often expeditious consultations. During my first consultation with the midwife, I immediately felt comfortable. The welcome is warm, and we always start with a little update to find out, for example, if everything is going well with my current contraception. This is also the time when I can ask him all my questions, on any subject. She always takes the time to listen to me, and that couldn't be more appreciated. The other thing that struck me was when she had to check on me. Unlike gynecologists, the midwife does not ask me to undress completely. Which is rather reassuring and less "brutal". She even puts a blanket on my shoulders to keep me from getting cold, and I have to admit, it's kinda nice to feel so pampered. Another point not to be overlooked: the price of the consultation. I usually paid between 60 and 80 € at a gynecologist, today I pay between 25 and 30 € at the midwife. In short, I can tell you with all honesty: it was the best decision of my life.
But I am not the only one to have abandoned my gynecologist for a midwife. And sometimes, some take the plunge for much more serious reasons. Inappropriate remarks for example, which do not leave indifferent. This is the case of Marion, 25, who has had nothing but bad experiences with her gynecologists. "The first time I was there I received some very unpleasant comments, some about my weight. Then I went because my pill did not suit me: heavy weight gain, depression, lack of libido, etc. I was told "oh well yes but it will be like that with all the pills", she prescribed me another one (without telling me about other possible options), I never took it. I inquired on my own and decided to have an IUD inserted, I went to the site gynandco.wordpress.com and I found a midwife not far from my home who was inserting IUDs to nulliparas. From the first date, I hooked up, she was gentle, explained everything step by step, which is very reassuring, and took great care to check that the IUD would be suitable for me.», She testifies.
Women shun gynecologists, it's a reality
Since 2009, midwives can take care of the gynecological follow-up of healthy women. But today, there is indeed a lack of knowledge about the role of the midwife in gynecological follow-up. "Today, the knowledge that you can go to a midwife for something other than pre or postpartum is still not well understood. So let's say it loud and clear: you can go see a midwife to ensure your contraceptive and gynecological follow-up!», Says Sabrina Debusquat, science journalist specializing in women's health. And if more and more women are now turning to midwives for their gynecological follow-up, it is because they have good reasons.
"Many of them do not feel heard enough during gynecological consultations. Through my Paye Ta Contraception accounts on social networks, I receive a lot of testimonials indicating several behaviors that bother women in consultation for contraception. Most of the complaints are about lack of listening. Many women say they are not heard or believed when they complain about side effects of contraception. Others are not listened to in their desire to stop taking hormonal contraception. Other times, the side effects they face are minimized, even outright denied or routinely referred to other causes.», Explains the specialist.
"Many women come out of consultations without contraceptive solutions (or with a prescription for contraception that does not satisfy them), feel infantilized, even humiliated and sometimes never return to see a gynecologist. Finally, other practices such as systematic undressing or vaginal examinations presented as compulsory, even though this is scientifically unfounded, bother many women. I am also regularly reported judgments on sex life, couple or grossophobia. In short, listening, empathy and taking into account the desires of patients still seem to improve in gynecology consultations.», Continues Sabrina Debusquat.
Why is there such a difference in treatment between gynecologists and midwives?
Although this should not be made an absolute generality, midwives are generally kinder and more attentive to their patients. "Gynecologists are trained in pathology, in disease and therefore in what goes wrong and their training is mainly focused on treatment. Midwives are trained in a woman's natural physiology, her body, her cycles and how it all comes into play, especially during childbirth. In fact, midwives are therefore both more attentive to the natural physiology of women and more simply to listen. They are often less in the medical aspect and more in the human aspect and that is what patients are looking for.», She explains.
Gynecological violence and sexual abuse disguised as medical acts
But sometimes the consultations get out of hand. Many women today denounce the gynecological and obstetrical violence they have suffered in silence. These can be expressed in many ways: inappropriate, malicious or infantilizing comments, unwanted acts, compulsory contraception, failure to respect patients' rights (in particular that of being informed and being able to refuse treatment) pain that is minimized or ridiculed, or even the absence of anesthesia during surgery, for example.
"Gynecological violence is a chilling reality, and unfortunately widespread. I hardly know a woman who has not one day undergone an endovaginal ultrasound without consent before introduction, an infantilizing or judging consultation or even an inappropriate remark such as “Don't be so cozy” when introducing a IUD. What women experience in the secrecy of the gynecology office, and under medical authority, is deeply sad and linked to our long patriarchal history which has all power over the female body, which must endure in silence and including the vagina too often turns into a station hall without his consent.», Says Sabrina Debusquat.
On June 29, 2018, the High Council for Equality between Women and Men submitted its report "Sexist acts during gynecological and obstetrical follow-up: from remarks to violence, the need to recognize, prevent and condemn sexism", To Marlène Schiappa, Secretary of State for Equality between Women and Men. In it, we learned in particular that 3.4% of the complaints lodged with the Order of Physicians in 2016 concerned sexual assault and rape committed by doctors.
"Medicine and gynecology are places of violence against women and their bodies. According to some feminists, such as Marie-Hélène Lahaye, it is even a place where it is particularly exercised and where the control over women's bodies is particularly significant.», Explains the journalist and specialist in women's health.
Inappropriate vaginal touching, caresses, inappropriate words or gestures… Acts and behaviors like these amount to rape and are deeply reprehensible. Unfortunately, they are still largely ignored. But to prevent them, facilitate their reporting and condemn them, the voices of women are increasing. This is a good thing and we must continue. "Witnessing gynecological violence is allowing other women around us to understand that they have been too. It means participating, drop by drop, in forming a real wave that will change practices. I am convinced of it.», Concludes Sabrina Debusquat.
Thanks to Sabrina Debusquat, scientific journalist specializing in women's health and author of two books on contraception: "J'arrête la pill" (I have read) and "Tired of suffering for my contraception, feminist feminist manifesto for contraception fully fulfilling "(Les Liens qui Libéré), whose publication was linked to the #PayeTaContraception account, as well as to a petition, asking the French government to move forward towards a world where no one suffers from their contraception.