According to an American neuroscientist, and despite what yours might lead you to believe, teenagers still need their parents.
Slamming of doors, balance of power, permanent negotiations, questioning of authority … At first glance, and to hear them, teenagers no longer need their parents. They often think of themselves as adults and try to behave as such, although sometimes, for a moment, they become our babies again. If these rare little moments of tranquility seem insignificant compared to the grueling daily life they make you live, science may well come to reassure you a little. An interview with neuroscientist and adolescent behavior specialist Ron Dahl, published in 2016 by the University of Berkeley's Institute for Human Development, suggests that adolescents need their parents more than ever, as their brains continue to develop and develop. to mold oneself.
Read also: Help, I have a teenager at home!
After entering adolescence, a child faces new emotions and the advice of adults, especially parents, is very important. According to Ron Dahl, “From the age of 9 to 14, children want to be admired and respected more. We don't know exactly what children become sensitive to, but it is a matter of status, acceptance, belonging, admiration and valuing that becomes more important. "
Contrary to what you might think, a teenager doesn’t only care about what their peers think, even if their opinion is important. “It's not just that,” continues the neuroscientist. They enjoy being admired by adults, teachers, coaches and their parents. "
A strong parent / child relationship would play a major role in their future emotional stability, their positive outlook on themselves, as well as in their ability to build relationships with others. Additionally, teens who have a strong bond with their parents are known to be less likely to engage in dangerous activities, including reckless driving, drugs, and reckless sex.
These phrases that I would like my teens to remember
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The difficulty of adolescence
If there is one thing that everyone agrees on, it's that adolescence is no picnic. The changing body, the battle hormones, the emotions that oscillate between joy and sorrow and the unpleasant feeling that this period will never end … Some people experience this relatively well and come out unscathed, while others are marked with life.
Once you become an adult, and especially a parent, it is important not to forget the complex challenges you faced as a teenager. They are, of course, very difficult to follow, but as you look past the scowl, you will only be able to see the confusion that reigns within them.
Keeping a good relationship with your child at this age is a real challenge for a parent, which forces you to constantly question yourself. Despite everything, we all dream of seeing them become fulfilled adults and well in their heads, don't we? So, with (a lot) of patience, understanding and kindness, your teenager should come out of this period without too much damage, and you too!