She has to take a pseudonym and she chooses Oksana. For the rest, however, everything is true: Ukrainian, 47 years old, civil servant. In this summer of 2023, she would like to testify about what happened to her during the Russian invasion, as part of the first conference on sexual violence in times of war organized in kyiv by the Sema-Ukraine association. Oksana opens her mouth, but her voice fails. The gaze plunges to the ground: “I actually don’t remember anything, I was blindfolded, I’m so ashamed. » Around her, we delicately avoid watching her walk away towards the exit.
“To speak is to condemn oneself to a form of death”, comments a woman. She also took a code name: Viktoria. Profile: trader, 61 years old. Viktoria has been planning to testify for months, but she is still hesitant. “Considering my age, I have enough strength to speak. It’s up to us to do it, the oldest, not the young people who still have their lives ahead of them”, Viktoria says, as if to convince herself. Of course, she never said anything to those close to her. They suspect it, but they too avoid the subject. Then, suddenly, Viktoria blurts out: “The time has come to sacrifice myself, to put my dignity aside. » She tries not to think about anything except the country. And she starts.
So, this happened in a pretty wooded neighborhood, in the suburbs of kyiv, at the start of the Russian invasion, in March 2022. Faced with the advance of the tanks, the residents had fled, almost all of them, including the family. by Victoria. She had insisted on staying and protecting the villa: the couple had already lost everything once in 2014, when the Donbass war forced them to leave Donetsk, in the east of the country. The family couldn’t afford to start from scratch again, they all knew that. Viktoria had told herself that the Russian soldiers would not care about a woman like her, already a grandmother and without a man at home. Harmless.
When a hundred soldiers invaded the town, they ordered him not to go out anymore. Viktoria heard them looting the deserted homes, one after the other, positioning their armored vehicles and snipers everywhere. After a few days, a Russian soldier pushed the gate. We could only see his eyes between the helmet and the scarf that hid his face. He must have been 20 years old, no more. ” Take off your clothes “, he said, before pushing her outside, naked in the snow. His rifle was poking her in the back, she was forced to run around the house. When she fell to her knees, he kicked her up.
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