Couples therapist warns: These 3 sentences can ruin your relationship

relationship
Couples therapist warns: These sentences will ruin your relationship!

Jealousy, in-laws, money problems … there are a lot of arguments in a relationship. According to the American psychologist and couples therapist Alexandra Solomon, the relationship crisis also lurks behind certain statements. In the Psychology Today she reveals which three sentences you should never say when you want a harmonious relationship.

1. If you loved me, you would …

Hui, a pretty mean sentence! Because the: the partner: can hardly reply in the right way. According to Solomon, one should rather avoid such allegations and say: “I don’t understand why you are reluctant to do it. I interpret this to mean that you don’t love me enough”. This makes your point of view clear without declaring the claim as fact. A much better and, above all, fair basis for discussion!

2. Why can’t it be the same between us as it used to be?

A question that comes to many people’s lips when they do not want to admit that the partnership is changing. Of course, one lives and loves differently in the seventh year than in the first. Which doesn’t have to mean that you can’t change anything in the situation. If you want to bring a breath of fresh air into the relationship again, you should rely on concrete suggestions, says the psychologist. Example: “I would like us to do more together again this weekend!”. This gives you a much better chance of changing a certain thing in life together.

3. You act like your mother / father!

Bad! Because even if this is not necessarily an insult, the other person will often perceive it as an attack. According to Solomon, it is much better to address the specific behavior and the effects on yourself: For example: “If you get that loud, it scares me!

By the way, there are more sentences that can endanger the relationship:

6 sentences you can’t take back in a relationship

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Brigitte