Emotionally unreachable: 5 signs that you can tell

Emotionally unavailable ?!
5 signs that you can tell

Our emotions fulfill many different functions. For example, they can alert us when something is wrong in our life or show what or who is particularly important to us. They help us with decisions and can reveal how we see the world and how we feel about it. They also distinguish us from others, make us unique and irreplaceable. And they create a connection to our fellow human beings, because without emotions we could not love, empathize or have real understanding.

But despite all the enthusiasm: Very few people deal with their own emotions that smoothly. Some get into their moods, others try to ignore or even kill their emotions, still others regularly fail to understand their inner impulses correctly – and some just fail to allow deep, emotional ties to others. No matter how present, lovable, funny, charming and sociable they are, they always remain distant and emotionally unreachable – both for friends and for potential partners. The following characteristics are typical of such emotionally inaccessible people.

5 signs that you can recognize as “emotionally unavailable people”

1. You are noticeably sociable and open-minded

Emotionally unreachable people are typically great small talkers, incredibly personable, funny, open, interesting, curious – people you like immediately and want to get to know better. One reason for this: Emotionally unavailable people (EUP) are simply so used to socializing and networking with others on a superficial level that it is child’s play for them. Loose connections are their comfort zone and compensate for the lack of deep relationships in their lives as they satisfy their need for community and social belonging.

2. You like to meet in groups

Meetings for two are not necessarily in the interests of emotionally unreachable people. They prefer to meet up with several people (at least if there is no pandemic …) because the conversations and the interaction with each other in groups are usually more non-binding and superficial than on a two-person date.

3. You always seem to be in a good mood

Whenever possible, EUPs never talk to others about serious problems. You rarely see them angry, sad or in a bad mood, instead they always seem happy and dancing through life. What is behind it: Showing yourself vulnerable to someone creates intimacy and a lot of closeness and commitment. And that is exactly what makes emotionally unreachable people the greatest fear.

4. They are available for every (vacation) flirt

EUPs are only too happy to get involved in relationships that basically have no chance due to external circumstances. A passionate vacation flirt, a friendship via Instagram or Twitter – emotionally inaccessible people like to invest time and energy in such connections, because real closeness is as good as impossible. And should it arise …

5. You distance yourself as soon as it gets more serious

… emotionally unreachable people withdraw immediately. Suddenly they don’t let anyone hear from them, are too busy and now technically almost inaccessible. They typically ghost others when they are harassed, that is, when they show genuine interest.

Important: It is difficult to judge whether emotionally unreachable people are inevitably unhappy and miss something. Certainly, deep, stable and long-term relationships are an enrichment in their lives for many, give them stability and create meaning. But their freedom and the inspiration they draw from the multitude of their contacts can be just as fulfilling for EUPs. What matters is how we feel and how satisfied we are with our life, and that is absolutely individual. Those who are emotionally inaccessible to others and are happy with it should stay that way, those who feel lonely just jump over their own shadow and learn to let others close (of course difficult, but guaranteed to be possible). Every person and every life plan is right in its own way – just not for everyone …

sus
Brigitte