Does he burst into tears at the slightest annoyance or explode with joy in a disproportionate way? Taken by too intense emotions, your child may be hypersensitive. What are the signs ? What should or should not be done to accompany your child? The answers with the child psychiatrist Stéphane Clerget.
Hypersensitive or just shy?
Unfortunately, we tend to confuse them, but a hypersensitive child is not necessarily shy or introverted, and vice versa. " A shy child may have difficulty speaking, but that does not mean that they will be more affected than others by different stimuli. », Explains Stephane Clerget. What characterizes a hypersensitive child is that he will express his emotions widely, because these are extremely tenfold in him. Sometimes he gets into such a state that it becomes cumbersome for others.
How does hypersensitivity manifest itself in a child?
The hypersensitive child will react more intensely than the average child their age, and more frequently. " What should be remembered is that this concerns the whole range of emotions: joy, sadness, empathy, fear, anger, jealousy, frustration, bitterness … -to say that a child who would only express anger for example, would not be hypersensitive », Says the child psychiatrist. For parents, this difference is more difficult to perceive when it comes to an elder, and there are no other children in reference.
In addition, hypersensitive children often suffer from hyperesthesia, that is, physical hypersensitivity. They are more likely to develop allergic reactions, eczema, jumpy, or have more pain than others. They will not like too loudly to speak, and their food range may be narrower as they will prefer light foods like rice or pasta. " Finally, although it is not mandatory, there can also be cognitive hypersensitivity, with children thinking and ruminating a lot. », Adds the specialist.
From what age can we speak of hypersensitivity?
In fact, an infant can already be hypersensitive. " In fact, hypersensitivity is one of the rare differential factors in newborns », Observes the child psychiatrist. Concretely, these will be children who are more reactive than others to different stimuli. They will cry more, feel the cold or the heat, be reactive to carrying. " This is why we wonder if there are no genetic factors », Continues Stéphane Clerget.
Predisposing factors?
Although it has not yet been identified, it is speculated that a gene could be responsible for the hypersensitivity. If the parent himself is a hypersensitive person, this same genetic component can come into play, or the child can potentially be modeled on his parent. " It is also assumed that there is also a constructed hypersensitivity when parents – even if they are not hypersensitive themselves – are very caring and sensitive to their child's reactions. Conversely, a child whose parent is neglectful could also develop hypersensitivity to make him react. It is therefore a sort of adaptation to the environment », Analyzes the specialist.
What difficulties can hypersensitivity generate in a child's life?
The hypersensitive child can be taken by his emotions, sensations and at times his ruminations. Certainly, this can help him develop strong emotional intelligence. But the risk is that these emotions parasitize his mind and obstruct various learning, whether academic or social. They are also children who tire quickly, and need more sleep. " Hypersensitivity can lead to communication problems with family or peers who do not understand this hyperemotion. In the social field, it can therefore be handicapping on a daily basis », Notes Stéphane Clerget.
A lifelong character trait?
This hypersensitivity is likely to continue into adulthood, but not everything happens in childhood. " In adolescence, we observe great changes in the brain. So there may be changes and attenuations of hypersensitivity “Says the child psychiatrist.
As parents, what to do about this hypersensitivity?
Already, it is important to identify this heightened sensitivity and to take it into account in the way we communicate with the child. That is to say that those around him must avoid stimulating him too much: avoid big surprises, big arguments or even frustrations. For example, we warn that we will stop playing in 5 minutes. You can also describe to the child their day the next day. All of this to help prepare him emotionally.
"He is also taught to recognize his emotions well so that he can express what he is feeling. For that, we start by being transparent about our own feelings as parents. », Advises the child psychiatrist. In addition, it can be beneficial to help him express his emotions through writing, dancing, drawing, singing, music … It doesn't matter whether he is gifted or not! Sports are also important in helping them to free themselves emotionally and to learn to be self-confident.
And conversely, what should you avoid doing?
Mistaking hypersensitivity for hyperactivity! " I meet a lot of kids who have been labeled hyperactive and end up with treatments that they shouldn't be taking. The two are sometimes confused as a hypersensitive child may have difficulty concentrating and focusing their attention due to being caught up in their emotions. », Notes the child psychiatrist.
It is also important not to overstimulate the child and avoid screens as much as possible. The parent should also not confide too much in his child so as not to make him bear too heavy an emotional load. It must therefore be preserved from certain difficulties of the adult world. Finally, " of course you should never blame a child for being such as he is », Adds Stéphane Clerget.
When to consult a psychologist or a child psychiatrist?
When the child appears distressed, has learning difficulties at school, has difficulty concentrating, his social relationships are suffering from his hypersensitivity, or negative emotions dominate him that he is act out of sadness or anger. " Do not hesitate to consult alone when you feel helpless in order to ask for advice, without the child necessarily being present », Advises Stéphane Clerget.