On Twitter, author and mom Clare Mackintosh sent a message filled with hope to bereaved parents after the loss of a child.
Losing a child is the biggest tragedy in the life of a parent. Often times, he imagines that the pain will be overwhelming, that he will never get over it. That he will never be able to live and smile like before. That this feeling of emptiness and sadness will never go away.
Yet after mourning, it is possible to see the light at the end of the tunnel. This is the message author and mother Clare Mackintosh wanted to share with bereaved parents. On Twitter, she used her best pen to assure them that the pain they felt will one day be gone. A poignant text, but filled with hope for them.
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“My son died fourteen years ago today. If you are going through the loss of a loved one, I have a few promises to make ”, she begins to write. Before adding: “I promise you it won't always be the first thing you think of in the morning. I promise you that you will not stay awake every night, crying until you can no longer breathe (…) I promise you that these waves of sadness and mourning that invade you will become smaller and less violent (…) I promise you that you will talk about him feeling nostalgic and sad, but more broken (…) I promise you that your suffering will decrease. "
I promise you can say her first name without crying.
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Clare Mackintosh then explains that she heard these words from another woman at the time of her son’s death. “I cried in silence when I heard her tell me that she had gotten over her loss and I couldn't tell myself that she was right. My grief seemed different to me. Then you will probably tell yourself that I am wrong, but in 5 years, 9 years, 12 years or 14 years, you will realize that that pain in your throat will be gone, and you will make these promises to someone in the future. 'other', she asserts. And to conclude: “In the meantime, be kind and patient to yourselves, grieving takes time. "