If things are not going well at work, it is often due to wrong beliefs that block us. The coaches Dorothea Assig and Dorothee Echter explain how we recognize such career myths and free ourselves from them.
Brigitte: The title of your book sums up what many employees who are highly committed to their job probably hope for from their superiors: “One day you will see how good I am!”
Dorothea Assig: And then they’re disappointed when they don’t receive praise, promotion or a salary increase.
Exactly. But isn’t there some truth in this notion, in other words: Shouldn’t performance and career actually go hand in hand?
Not necessarily. On the one hand, today it is much more difficult than it used to be to even recognize a good performance as such. Many projects are very complex, but the result looks easy. The praise of the superiors then falls away because they do not even recognize the achievement. And even if: If you want to make a career, you not only have to deliver good performance, but also inspire goodwill among superiors and colleagues.
How can I get that done?
Dorothee Echter: It is important to assume that those you work with have good motives – even if they want to achieve the same goals as you do in a different way. If you want to make a career, you should show this appreciation to everyone, bosses and colleagues alike, be it with a sincere compliment, a thank you card or by introducing people who should know each other.
And how do you draw attention to your own successes?
Assig: You have to decode them correctly yourself. That means: Don’t get caught up in the small things and list chronologically which steps led to success. You should recognize and name your own competence in this process. This can be, for example, the staying power that someone showed before the contract was signed.
Echter: Many are technically very good. When it comes to which of them will have a career, however, things that go beyond the technical level are decisive. Those who succeed in perceiving their own work as outstanding and also formulating this stand out.
In this context, they also advise refraining from “negative talking” to superiors. That irritated me. Actually, the trend is towards open communication – also towards the boss …
Assig: We should be aware that even small irritations decide about careers. If two employees are both doing a good job, the manager will not promote the one who likes to badmouth others, including the manager, in the kitchenette. If disappointment has to come out, then in a private setting…
Echter: It’s like this: bosses really want to hear criticism, they don’t lie when they say that. But their subconscious works differently. When the next exciting project comes up and there are two or three people to choose from, don’t give it to the person who recently had different ideas about something than you did. We’ve been observing corporate feedback culture and psychological research on the topic for decades now praise and criticism. And the result is: Criticism from others has a devastating effect on the person being criticized. Sometimes we can still remember it decades later.
But doesn’t constant praise also have a devastating effect? How are processes supposed to improve if it is not possible to criticize?
Different opinions are still possible. But it is more effective to emphasize what your own approaches and desires are than to tell the other person why he or she is talking nonsense. If you’re being attacked, express understanding of the other person’s point of view, emphasize the value of discussing different perspectives — and then bring your point of view back. It depends on the tone.
Another career myth you debunk in your book is: “Career planning is the business of the company.” What is wrong with this notion?
Assig: A company wants good work to be done. And if the performance is right, then the supervisor thinks: “Bravo, you stay here!” If you want to get ahead, you have to take your career planning into your own hands. For example, it would be good to meet with people outside the company more often.
Ah, targeted networking! What many still shy away from…
For no reason I think. You don’t just stand at the Federal President’s champagne reception. It’s more about staying in regular contact with influential people you like and doing things you love with them. If you have children, you are invited to a barbecue together, if you like playing football, you can meet up with others in the park. Very inconspicuous activities, but behind which there is a long-term strategy: I want my ambition to make a career out into the world!
The concept of serendipity, which you celebrate in your book, fits in with this. What does it mean?
Echter: In principle, he describes the opposite of another career myth: “Career is a matter of luck.” Because, of course, opportunities and chances do not automatically lead to success. You also have to recognize and perceive them. Serendipity stands for this open-minded attitude. If I decide to go to a reception, I may meet a new customer there who I can tell about my project. If I’ve practiced talking about myself and my abilities, it will eventually pay off when I sit next to a decision-maker and start a conversation with him.
Which career myth is actually the most widespread?
Assig: You can’t generalize like that. These beliefs are subtle and hard to spot. They subtly block career ambitions, call for even more work effort and not career strategies. Everyone chooses the myth that suits them. Anyone who wants to make a career is often accompanied by their own fears and ambivalences – and clings to such sentences in their own insecurity.
Is there a career myth that you’ve been taken on by yourself?
Real: Oh yes! At the beginning of my career, I also thought that performance was crucial. Then twice I was given the job of someone who could do less – at least that’s what I thought. What helped me was that I really wanted to get ahead and asked an experienced coach.
Away with the myths! Dorothea Assig and Dorothee Echter have been advising top managers and top politicians for many years and guiding them through tricky situations. In her book “One day you will see how good I am!” (224 p., 20 euros, Ariston) they put typical career myths to the test, which are entwined with professional advancement, and explain how to break away from them.