Benjamin Franklin effect
Use this brilliant trick to get people to like you
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Do you sometimes feel uncomfortable asking someone for a favor? It doesn’t have to be – on the contrary: according to the Benjamin Franklin effect, it even makes you more likeable!
Many of us are reluctant to ask for help and believe that we have to do everything on our own. This is total nonsense! The next time you’re struggling with descaling the office coffee machine, maybe you should ask the colleague who always looks so unfriendly for help. In fact, you could actually benefit twice as much if she does you a favor – she’ll probably find you more likeable than before.
What?, you’re probably thinking now. Is it supposed to make me more likeable when someone else does something for me? Yes, that’s actually true and it’s a scientific phenomenon called the “Benjamin Franklin Effect.”
Benjamin Franklin already knew this: We like who we help
This psychological trick goes back to the American author and statesman Benjamin Franklin. He is said to have attracted a rival to his side. Franklin asked this acquaintance if he could borrow a special book from his library. The man is said to have been very flattered by this question and was happy to lend the book.
After the clever Franklin returned the book with a laudatory thank you letter, his former enemy is said to have treated him only with the utmost kindness – and they are even said to have become lifelong friends.
The Benjamin Franklin effect: study confirms the effect
This entertaining anecdote is not proven, but the two psychologists Jon Jecker and David Landy were able to prove in 1969 that the Benjamin Franklin effect, which is named after it, actually works study prove. Three different groups won money. The first group was supposed to return their winnings because the psychology department supposedly ran out of money. The study director personally addressed the second group and asked for the money to be returned. The last group simply kept their winnings.
The result of the study: The participants liked the scientist best when they personally gave him the money back. He was least liked by the group that was allowed to keep their money.
The researchers suspected that the Benjamin Franklin effect is based on cognitive dissonance. Our brain cannot reconcile the two different mental events – that we like a person and that we dislike that person. Therefore, it then chooses to like the person to resolve the dissonance.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help – people will like you for it!
Other psychologists suspect that the Benjamin Franklin effect is based on the fact that we intuitively sense that the person asking us for help wants to befriend us. Because of what is known as “reciprocal affection,” we then automatically reciprocate these positive feelings.
Whatever the correct explanation for this phenomenon is. In any case it seems to work. So next time you want someone to like you, do like Benjamin Franklin and ask them to do something. She won’t be able to help but like you!
Sources used: businessinsider.com, effectiviology.com