If you are freshly in love and act correctly in the decisive moments, you will know more quickly where you are – and create a good foundation for the relationship.
How do I start a new relationship well? "It takes a bit of courage to be yourself and patience," says psychologist Nicole Schiller-Köble. "Anyone who just tries to please the other person maintains a false image and in the end triggers disappointment." If you are freshly in love, her 10 tips will help you through the time between the first contact and the words "I love you".
1. Make a wish
Even if it's a little difficult for you freshly in love: express your wishes. This is the only way to avoid misunderstandings. It works best if you speak of yourself: "I may be a little strange, but I would be very happy if you …" Explain your expectations and ask the other person how they feel about it. Can he imagine finding a compromise?
2. Observe
Look and listen carefully: does he generally not like culture or is he just an opponent of the opera? So you get to know the other better. Perceive what is important to the other person without having a fixed picture beforehand. That also helps if you want to give him a present.
3. Draw boundaries
If he speaks to something that seems premature to you, tell him so. Conversely, you should also respect if he reacts evasively. Don't take this as a bad sign.
4. Make correct calls
If you just get his answering machine, leave a message – not three or ten. It is enough if the other person knows that you have thought of him.
5. Stay relaxed
If the other person reacts unexpectedly, stay relaxed. It would be wrong to get into negative interpretations. Better ask in a friendly manner.
6. Approach each other
Avoid rashly saying no when you disagree with something. It is better to make a counter-proposal. If you find yourself cornering the other, look for compromises that are fair to both sides.
7. Mention Ex
It is especially bad to rave about an old relationship. Signal to your loved one: the time was okay, but for one reason or another it didn't hold up. It should be clear to the partner that you have dealt with your separation stories.
8. Dosage instructions
As for friends and family, give your new love time to get to know everyone. Such first meetings are often exhausting because they involve a lot of uncertainties.
9. Balance
Find a good balance between closeness and distance. Of course, at the beginning you just prefer to spend time together. But you shouldn't isolate yourself too much from other social contacts as a couple.
10 speed limit
If you are emotionally driving in the fast lane, you may also move away from the other quickly. Don't rush to speak of love and let the other person come along emotionally.