Dating trends
Roasting: Why Teasing Your Partner Helps the Relationship
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Couples who can poke fun at each other are often happier in their relationships, research shows. But it is also important to accept boundaries.
“What loves each other is teasing,” as the saying goes. In fact, there seems to be something to this ancient wisdom – even scientific research confirms this. Accordingly, it is a good sign for the relationship if the partners annoy and tease each other. This trend is called “roasting” in English.
Couples who playfully confront each other with the little peculiarities and weaknesses from time to time usually have a strong, happy relationship. They often share the same sense of humor and can handle it when they are teased. People who are afraid of being laughed at tend to be less happy in their relationships, according to a study by the Martin Luther University in Halle-Wittenberg.
A common sense of humor gives the relationship a sense of security
The psychologist Jeffrey Hall from the University of Kansas comes to a similar conclusion, who evaluated 39 studies with a total of more than 15,000 participants on the subject of humor in relationships. Accordingly, it is particularly important for the success of a relationship that the partners have the same sense of humor. But the main thing is not that someone is constantly cracking jokes – rather, the fun that you have together is decisive. This is how security builds up in the relationship.
Dating coach Laurel House therefore advises: “Make sure that not only your personalities fit together, but also your sense of humor – so that no one is offended or hurt.” Raising your partner with his little quirks means giving importance to often ignored parts of his character, she told the “Cosmopolitan”: “These little quirks are usually the things that you love most about your partner.”
Beware: there are limits
With such jokes you send a sign that you love the other person despite these little weaknesses. At the same time, it is also a way of addressing difficult topics in a humorous way – and hoping that the partner understands the hint of the fence post.
However, it is important to accept borders there too. Even people, who usually have no problem with being poked, can be deeply hit by unsuccessful jokes. Laurel House warns that jokes should never go below the belt. Insulting or derogatory jokes are taboo.
Sources: “Cosmopolitan” / University of Kansas / “Science Daily”
This article originally appeared on stern.de.