Should you use a few minutes of isolation in the room to punish your child? If so, how to do it, and is it effective?
Should you send your child to his room to punish him?
Marie-Claude Bossière, child psychiatristHospital Practitioner, and psychiatrist at the Maison des Femmes de Saint Denis, does not see in the fact ofsend a child to his room an act of abuse. “It’s his room, with his toys, his books, things he loves. This helps him calm down.”
Opinions on this subject differ, between supporters and detractors of Time Out. This is the name of this method which consists of put the child aside, most often in his room, for a few minutes. If for some it is a punishment standard, others see it as a ordinary educational violence. For Marie-Claude Bossière, “it is not violence, on the contrary it is a way of avoiding violence.” since, for their part, the adult can also calm down and avoid shouting or even making violent gestures.
How to send your child to his room to punish him?
If you wish to use the Time Out methodthe key is not to use it all the time, but also to calmly explain the sanction to the child, without verbal or physical violence, and to ensure that this does not distress him. You should also not lock him up, or force him to stay in his room. “You can tell your child that we will meet in 5-10 minutes, time to calm down, and then we will talk.” advises the child psychiatrist.
The aim of this sanction is to allow the child – but also sometimes the parent – to calm down and bring down their level of irritation, and to think about the fault they may have committed in order to no longer be tempted. to start again. But is it really effective?
Is punishing your child in their bedroom effective?
The effectiveness of such a method depends, to a large extent, on the child’s personality. But also in the way it is applied. You must ensure that this sanction is not humiliating for your child, and that he or she understands what is happening.
If you notice that your child is feeling unwellto be put aside, or even that it fuels his anger, is that it is not the right method for both of you. You will then probably quickly notice that Time Out is not effective in your situation.
Sources:
Marie-Claude Bossière child psychiatrist, CAP Early childhood training, SOS Nancy, Mana Clinic, Sophie Dervillée psychologist
Read also :
⋙ Education: this punishment that the Council of Europe could ban
⋙ Positive education: “The child would need at least ten minutes of total attention per day”.
⋙ Putting your child in a corner: good or bad idea?