Seriously… who da fuck needs fall decor?

Seriously…
Who da fuck needs fall decorations?

©Getty Images

The thermometer has barely left the 30 degree mark when pumpkins, monsters and colorful plastic leaves are everywhere. Our author thinks that’s totally silly.

by Marie Stadler

It’s that time again. Instead of simply replacing the gummy flamingos and the mango prosecco with speculoos, which would really make sense and above all be pragmatic, they laid out pumpkins again. So those that you CANNOT eat. The whole thing is then called autumn decoration. Yes no, that’s clear. All common alternatives are unfortunately no better. Who, if you please, would like to see little porcelain hedgehogs, garden gnomes in rubber boots or ugly resin witches in their apartment? And pumpkins are totally great, but only as a soup, puree, baked if necessary. I would place the decoration factor somewhere in the minus range. What are they supposed to be good for? I don’t put inedible strawberries on in the summer either.

Where to put the stuff in December?

The real question I have is: where to put the ugly stuff in December? It’s annoying anyway, having to set up and dismantle all the Advent stuff again and again. Just that at least I get the meaning. Christmas decorations are at least beautiful. Plus, it’s great to decorate the house in December, and it’s just as nice to put away all that shitty stuff in January when you’ve had your fill of it. So after two months. But fall decorations make me aggro before I can even buy them (which, by the way, I never would).

There are autumn decorations in the forest

The really only nice alternative to hedgehogs and the like is – if you ask me – in the forest. There you will find beautifully colored leaves that look really pretty next to a few candles. Cones, moss, nuts and chestnuts are also easy to find in nature. In addition to the unbeatable price (namely free), I think there is one thing that is really great about the forest decoration: After use, you don’t need an empty drawer (who has that please?), just a compost heap or the bio bin. Clean with it and goodbye. In addition, you have at least once hung up your exhaust gas-plagued nose in the forest. It’s extremely relaxing and healthy. By the way, it’s called “forest bathing” in modern German, but that’s actually just as silly as the word “decoration” for perfectly normal pumpkins.

barbara

source site-51